Green’s Dictionary of Slang

crap v.2

[crap n.1 ]

1. in the context of defecation.

(a) to filthy with excrement.

[UK]Swell’s Night Guide 50: S’elp my snivery! [...] but old Fuzzle Fart has crapped his kicksies. [Ibid.] 77: She stalled a lushy swaddie to a doss t’other darky, and ven the swaddy piped her mug in the morning, he was so stunned with the uglies, that he crapped the pad.
[US](con. 1944) N. Mailer Naked and Dead 93: The dumb kid had been so afraid he must have crapped his pants.
[US]J. Jones From Here to Eternity (1998) 452: I couldna got it if he wasn’t scared so bad he crapped his pants.
[UK]E. Bond Saved Scene vi: It’ll crap itself t’ death.
[Ire]F. Mac Anna Ship Inspector 9: I had crapped my trousers in front of the whole school.
[US]Alt. Eng. Dict. 🌐 crap (verb, trans.) defecate [...] ‘John crapped his pants.’.
[Aus]R.G. Barrett Leaving Bondi (2013) [ebook] Sidelevers looked like he was ready to crap his pants.
[US]C. Stella Rough Riders 29: ‘That kid really crap his pants?’ [...] ‘Go take a whiff’.

(b) to visit the lavatory, to defecate.

[UK]Hotten Dict. of Modern Sl. etc. 26: to ease oneself, to evacuate.
[UK]Sl. Dict.
[UK]G.F. Northall Folk-Phrases of Four Counties 38: Crap = To discharge excrement.
[US]N. Algren ‘Thundermug’ in Texas Stories (1995) 67: I wouldn’t let a jig smell the hole where I crapped in.
[UK]K. Amis letter 31 Dec. in Leader (2000) 32: God I must cræp.
[US]J. Jones From Here to Eternity (1998) 156: ‘Do you ask him when its time to crap?’ Sal hung his head and did not answer, blushing.
[UK]‘Count Palmiro Vicarion’ Limericks 33: But he crapped out-of-doors like a man.
[UK]B. Kops Dream of Peter Mann Act II: Never crap on your own doorstep.
[US]‘Iceberg Slim’ Pimp 87: His brow telescoped like I was going to [...] catch his mother crapping in my hat.
[UK]B.S. Johnson All Bull 165: I became aware of a stench suggesting that either the adjutant’s dog had crapped on the parade ground, or one of the squad had in his pants.
[UK]Flame : a Life on the Game 147: ‘Well, fucking crap in the sink, too,’ I shouted.
[US]C. Hiaasen Skin Tight 29: Gulls just crapped all over ’em.
[Ire]P. Howard The Joy (2015) [ebook] I start to feel like I’ve crapped out half me organs.
[UK]K. Sampson Powder 482: Two toilets which no one was allowed to crap in. 9 Jan. [blog] Eventually we’ll get down to the bastards who let their dogs crap in the street without clearing it up.
[UK]A. Wheatle Crongton Knights 116: ‘I think something crapped in the lift this morning. Disgusting’.

2. in fig. uses.

(a) (also crop) to annoy, to irritate.

[UK]Leaves from Diary of Celebrated Burglar 74/1: There was nothing cropped Joe so much as having his boots in a soiled state.
[US]J.T. Farrell ‘Spring Evening’ Short Stories [US ed. only] (1937) 148: Don’t crap me!
[Aus]W. Dick Bunch of Ratbags 140: ‘Who’d like to work in a shop? Not me!’ ‘Me neither,’ said Kev. ‘It’d crap yuh, all this yes-sir no-sir jazz.’.
[US](con. 1940s) C. Bram Hold Tight (1990) 19: ‘You’re crapping me!’ ‘Am I ever, honey.’.

(b) (also crap up) to tell deliberate lies (to).

[US]C. McKay Home to Harlem 131: Don’t crap me.
[US](con. 1920s) J.T. Farrell Judgement Day in Studs Lonigan (1936) 626: Don’t crap me, sister, because I’m not the kind of guy who lets himself get crapped. See?
[US] ‘Kate Smitz in “When th’ Moon Comes over the Mountain”’ [comic strip] in B. Adelman Tijuana Bibles (1997) 109: Don’t crap me lady – you like it.
[US]I. Shulman Cry Tough! 245: Don’t ask me, Michael, so I won’t have to crap you.
[US]B. Appel Tough Guy [ebook]‘ I’m just a station house flatfoot to crap up!’.
[US](con. 1950) E. Frankel Band of Brothers 296: You wouldn’t crap an old marine, would you, Pat?
[US](con. 1940s) G. Mandel Wax Boom 50: You said I was crapping you before, Hebe.
[US]T. Thackrey Thief 43: Anytime I had a date, I had to crap him some – tell him I was going to get laid.
[US]T. O’Brien Going After Cacciato (1980) 253: You crappin’ me?
J. Madsden Blogged Drain 17 Feb. [blog] The highlight of my sports radio week comes [...] in the form of a segment facilitated by personalities Terry Boers and Dan Bernstein called, ‘Who you crap’n?’.

(c) to complain.

[US]M. Levin Citizens 302: He was in here [...] crapping about how he didn’t say any of that stuff they had in the paper.
[Ire](con. 1940s) B. Behan Confessions 24: If you put some people down at the Ritz with a million nicker [...] they would still find something to crap about.
[UK]Indep. Rev. 26 Feb. 4: While red-eared men in blazers / Crap on about the game.

(d) to chatter.

[US]E. Hunter Blackboard Jungle 372: Are you still crapping about that show, Katz? [...] The term’ll be over in a few days, and he’s still talking about Christmas.

(e) (Aus.) to break down.

[Aus]N. Cummins Adventures of the Honey Badger [ebook] [pic. caption] When the air-con’s crapped itself and iot’s hotter than a flatscreen TV in a pawn shop .

In phrases

crap around (v.)

to fool about, to waste time; to prevaricate.

[US]M. Kantor El Goes South 178: ‘Oh, he crapped around.’ ‘What did he say?’ .
[US]B. Appel Brain Guy (1937) 37: Who wants to hang out on a corner for years, shooting pool, crapping around for two-cent jobs.
[US]B. Schulberg What Makes Sammy Run? (1992) 61: What good do you think it’s gonna do you to crap around with stuff like that?
[US]H. Ellison Web of the City (1983) 195: Stop the crappin’ around. Gimme the scoop, or I’ll put you down final.
[US]L. Hansberry Sign in Sidney Brustein’s Window in Three Negro Plays (1969) II iii: Don’t crap around. Is it true? Is it true she’s a hooker?
[US]T. Thackrey Thief 191: Let’s not crap around with each other. If I was going to put the bee on you, I’d have done it last night.
[US]‘Heat Moon’ Blue Highways 205: You think I like crapping around with tweeties?
crap in the same can (v.)

to be intimate, to be together.

[US]L. Lariar Day I Died 116: Miami Beach now — it’s a big dump. You and me don’t have to crap in the same can, do we now?
crap it (v.)

1. to be doomed, to suffer a serious mishap.

[UK]C. Wood ‘Prisoner and Escort’ in Cockade (1965) I iii: I honestly thought we’d crapped it.
[UK](con. 1954) J. McGrath Events While Guarding the Bofors Gun II ii: If you report me, you’ve crapped it, haven’t you? You’ve failed to keep a grip on your little guard [...] you have blotted your copybook.
[UK]M. Amis London Fields 149: ‘You did it.’ Keith rinsed his mouth with lager and said thickly, ‘Yeah well he crapped it, didn’t he?’.

2. to be terrified.

[Scot]I. Welsh Dead Man’s Trousers [20]: I’m seriously crapping it now too, the tension rising through me, as sharp as those scalpels.
crap it up (v.)

to ruin, to make a mess of.

[US]A. Harrington Psychopaths 77: ‘I . . . er, looked over your . . . the latest draft of your letter, Mr. Hoagland. There were parts that seemed a bit obscure, so I—’ ‘Crapped it up,’ said Hoagland.
[US]D. James Greenhouse 157: In this country we paved over most of our good land, or crapped it up with poison.
[UK]M. Korda Curtain 290: Never could unnerstan’ why people ordered caviar, then crapped it up with chopped onions, sour cream, chopped eggs.
[US]T. Plunkett Anthrax Chase 320: It was the fact that she couldn’t move around that crapped it up for both of our teams.
crap off (v.)

(N.Z.) to stop talking, esp. nonsense.

[NZ]P. Wilson N.Z. Jack 125: ‘She’s a fair-dinkum man-eater. She minces up blokes like you for breakfast.’ ‘Crap off,’ I said.
crap on (v.)

1. as imper., ‘to hell with’.

[US]C. McKay Banjo 112: ‘Crap on that magnamisuch!’ retorted Bugsy.
[US]C. Willingham End as a Man (1952) 40: Oh, crap on the whole thing.
[US]J. Thompson Pop. 1280 in Four Novels (1983) 406: ‘I got some news for you. Sort of a little secret [...]’ ‘Crap on the secret.’.
[US]S. King Stand (1990) 113: Crap on that, man.

2. (also crap over) to treat contemptuously, to victimize; to defeat heavily.

[UK]P. Larkin letter 14 July in Thwaite Sel. Letters (1992) 38: But I am afraid I cannot crap on Lewis because I am unfamilar with everything he has talked about so far.
[US](con. 1944) J.H. Burns Gallery (1948) 96: This was the moment Lieutenant Figarotta’d been sweating out for years, a chance to crap all over the folks from the old country.
[UK]K. Amis letter 8 July in Leader (2000) 433: If he asks your advice, I hope you’ll crap on the scheme a bit sharp.
[Aus]J. Hibberd White with Wire Wheels (1973) 190: mal: Envy written all over his face. simon: What! Of a common Valiant. mal: It’d crap on a Rover any time.
[US]‘Iceberg Slim’ Airtight Willie and Me 136: Are you creaming again to crap on your li’l free-spirit? Huh?
[US]R. Campbell In La-La Land We Trust (1999) 32: You might have servants you can crap on, but although we’re called public servants, we don’t stand for being crapped on.
[Aus]J. Byrell Lairs, Urgers & Coat-Tuggers 315: I reckon [...] Young Quinn would’ve crapped on Mount Eden in any length of match race.
[US]P. Cornwell Last Precinct 238: Rocky knew it would really piss me off if he crapped on my mother’s name.
[US]G. Pelecanos Way Home (2009) 63: Did he just phone you to crap on my wife.
[US]T. Robinson Rough Trade [ebook] ‘Okay, if everyone is through crapping on me’.
crap on (about) (v.) (also crap away)

to talk lengthily, if irrelevantly and usu. in a neg. manner (about).

[UK]K. Amis letter 9 May in Leader (2000) 204: He seems a wee bit fond of what he’s crapping on.
[Aus]A. Buzo Norm and Ahmed (1973) 23: I just crap on and spoil it all.
[Aus]B. Humphries Traveller’s Tool 41: She’ll start crapping on about wanting a ‘relationship’.
[Aus]T. Winton Lockie Leonard, Legend (1998) 115: I’m just crappin’ on, aren’t I?
[Aus]S. Maloney Big Ask 266: ‘What are you crapping on about, Whelan?’ he said.
[UK]J. Niven Kill Your Friends (2009) 3: I listen to some guy [...] crapping away on the speakerphone.
[Aus]P. Temple Truth 193: The prick tried on a compo for years. Non-smoker forced to endure smoke in confined spaces, et cetera. He never stopped crapping on about smoke, his asthma.
[Aus]K. Wood Diamond Spirit 35: Then she would crap on about the genetics of white horses, and why her horse was so special.
[Aus]C. Hammer Opal Country 148: ‘How was the Seer?’ ‘A whacko [...] crapping on about reading auras’.
crap someone along (v.)

to tell deliberate lies.

[US]T. Thackrey Thief 50: When they don’t know, they always try to crap you along.
crap someone around (v.)

to annoy, to irritate.

[US]B. Wood Killing Gift 232: And don’t crap me around. Believe me, you won’t be sorry.
crap up (v.)

1. (orig. US) to ruin by adding unnecessary or distasteful accessories; thus crapped up adj.

[US](con. 1920s) ‘Harry Grey’ Hoods (1953) 194: Who writes crapped-up stories to mislead the public?
[US](con. WWII) J. Jones Thin Red Line (1963) 268: He was not here for any crapped up West Point heroics, he was here because he was a brave man and a very good soldier.

2. (orig. US) to make a mess of; thus crapped up adj.

[US]N. Mailer Naked and Dead 350: Everything is crapped up.
[US](con. 1920s) ‘Harry Grey’ Hoods (1953) 267: The waiting room is all crapped up with those sleeping bastards. It looks lousy.
[US] in T.I. Rubin Sweet Daddy 58: Believe me, I’m not going to crap up my good time.
[US]L. Sanders Pleasures of Helen 237: ‘[T]his is going to be a great night [...] ‘We won’t let anyone or anything crap it up’.
[US]W.T. Vollmann You Bright and Risen Angels (1988) 48: His field glasses were finally starting to get kinda crapped up.