Green’s Dictionary of Slang

1. the penis.

c.1597		Shakespeare Henry IV Pt 2 II i: If his weapon be out: he will foin like any devil.
c.1605		Middleton More Dissemblers Besides Women III ii: Desires in both sexes have skill at that weapon.
1611		J. Cook Greenes Tu Quoque Scene xvii: spend: Thoul’t proove an obedient wife: come, let’s undresse. wid.: Will you put up your naked weapon sir? [...] spend: Not till I have some token of your love.
a.1625		Beaumont & Fletcher Love’s Cure II ii: Remember, Mistress, Nature hath given you a Sheath only, to signifie Women are to put up Men’s Weapons.
1635		H. Glapthorne Hollander V i: Yonder is a man would ravish me whether I would or no, [...] I thinke he has puld out the longest naked weapon, O there he is.
1647		Remonstrance of the Shee-Citizens 5: We shall not find them well weaponed (for we hate Souldiers that are not for the punctilio) but either dulled with often service, or their weapons broken near the handles .
c.1650		‘The Ladies’ Fort Besieged’ in Wardroper (1969) 83: Then stand off not coldly / But venture on boldly / With weapon in hand, with weapon in hand.
a.1661		‘The History of the Second Death of the Rump’ Rump Poems and Songs (1662) II 131: Your Weapons are long / Quoth she, and as strong, / My self of ’em both have made tryal.
1664		C. Cotton Virgil Travestie (1765) Bk IV 67: Much of his Breeding she did reckon; / But that which stab’d her was his Weapon.
1683		London Jilt pt 1 19: She found it more advantageous to return to Town, for to be the nearer to her Customers, and not to make poor young men run so far with their troublesome Weapons .
1709		N. Chorier (trans.) Meursius ‘The Delights of Venus’ in Cabinet of Love (1739) 194: As he push’d down, the Pain I sharper found, / And drew his Weapon from my bleeding Wound.
1720		in D’Urfey Pills to Purge Melancholy VI 146: Who knows no other cunning, / But when she feels it come; / To gripe your Back, if you be slack, / And thrust your Weapon home.
1730		Hist. of Col. Francis Charteris 36: The young Woman, being in no ways daunted, said [...] use a more manly Weapon. That I can soon do, Child, reply’d he, shewing her (as the Song says) what I dare not name.
1740		Dialogue Between a Married Lady and a Maid III: Philander turning hastily about, showed his Weapon naked.
1746		W. Dunkin Parson’s Revels (2010) 62: And make the stoutest Ladies feel / His Weapons.
1748–49		Cleland Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure (1985) 28: She had never heard of a mortal wound being given in those parts, by that terrible weapon.
1762		Bridges Homer Travestie (1764) I 189: With nimble bum, or nimbler wrist, / She guides his weapon where she lift; / Nay more, a touch of her soft hand, / If fallen down, will make him stand.
1775		‘Miss Gilmor’ in Ranger’s Impartial List of the Ladies of Pleasure in Edinburgh n.p.: She [...] has courage enough (although little) not to be afraid of the largest and strongest man that ever drew weapon in the cause of love.
c.1788		‘R. Birch’ ‘Venus School-Mistress’ in Pettit & Spedding 18C British Erotica III (2004) 14: As soon as she untied his hands, he took her by the waist, and [...] thrust again his weapon into her.
1797		Bridges Burlesque Homer (4th edn) I 263: All day let Mars and Pallas fight, / You weapons handle best at night.
1821		‘An Amateur’ Real Life in London II 258: A pond’rous weapon for a lady’s handling!
c.1850		Peeping Tom (London) 10 39/2: ‘Unless it is an artifical one, you carry a most formidable weapon’.
1857		Venus’ Miscellany (NY) 31 Jan. n.p.: He plied his weapon so manfully.
1883		Letters from Laura & Eveline 19: His tremendous weapon [...] quite a foot long , and as big round as a lady’s wrist.
1889		C. Deveureux Venus in India I 162: I could see that this splendid weapon grew broader and thicker at its base.
1896		‘Night in a Country House’ in Cabinet of Venus 68: He pulled it out [...] it was the first weapon I had ever handled.
1903		Kate Percival Life & Amours (1967) I 61: Herbert’s erect weapon, which we never ceased from handling.
1904		Lustful Memoirs of a Young and Passionated Girl 62: I directed the weapon into the sheath nature intended for it.
1922		Joyce Ulysses 506: Well for you, you muff, if you had the weapon with knobs and lumps and warts all over it.
1934		‘J.M. Hall’ Anecdota Americana II 112: P stands for Pecker — / [...] / A drain pipe by day and / A weapon by night.
c.1943		S .J. Baker Aus. Vulgarisms [t/s] 14: weapon: The penis.
1961		C. Himes Pinktoes (1989) 196: Little good ’twill do him with his little thing once she gets a taste of Riddick’s secret weapon.
1969		J. Hibberd Dimboola (2000) 95: Excuse me, lady, I wish to water the wisteria with my weapon.
1971		(con. WWII) B. Aldiss Soldier Erect 117: The terrible fellow has a weapon on him like a cucumber.
1979		‘Iceberg Slim’ Airtight Willie and Me 66: I volleyed my blood bloated weapon into her incredibly fat sex nest.
1993		J. Mowry Six Out Seven (1994) 247: Black fist on white weapon, white fist on Sooty Jimmy, some panting, some sweating, a lot of imagining.

2. in fig. use, a complete fool.

2019		Twitter 9 Jan. 🌐 The absolute state of it. What a complete weapon [i.e. a British neo-fascist].
2021		L. McInerney Rules of Revelation 92: [T]he mocking little weapons behind them were cluttering up the frequency.