Green’s Dictionary of Slang

bishop n.2

[SE bishop ]

1. a mixture of wine and water, topped off by a roasted orange, supposedly an episcopal favourite.

[Ire]Swift ‘Women Who Cry Oranges’ in A. Carpenter Verse in Eng. in 18C Ireland (1998) 185: Come, buy my fine Oranges / [...] / Well roasted, with sugar and wine in a cup. They’ll make a sweet bishop.
[UK]World 37 223: Punch, bishop, cool tankard, and negus are equally denied me .
[UK]Grose Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue.
[UK]Lex. Balatronicum.
[UK]Egan Life in London (1869) 99: Logic had a complete map of the Isles of Bishop and Flip.
[UK]Vidocq Memoirs (trans. W. McGinn) II 59: Boutrois, bring more ‘bishops’ as if it rained wine.
[UK]Dickens Pickwick Papers (1999) 642: A gentleman with one eye, and the landlord, who were drinking a bowl of bishop together.
[Aus]‘A Week in Oxford’ in Bell’s Life in Sydney 25 Oct. 2/2: The nearest approach to things ecclesiastical was a bowl of ‘bishop’ .
[UK]‘Cuthbert Bede’ Adventures of Mr Verdant Green (1982) I 131: He taught me [...] to make shandy-gaff and sherry-cobbler, and brew bishop and egg-flip.
[US]Sun (NY) 17 Feb. n.p.: You may never want a bumper of bishop.
[UK]Trollope Three Clerks (1869) 98: Come, you don’t like the brandy toddy, nor I either. We’ll see what sort of a hand they are at making a bowl of bishop.
[Aus]Bulletin (Sydney) 12 July 13/3: ‘My good man, you should not swear like that. Here is a tract. Go home and read it.’ ‘Take this bad “bishop”, old chap,’ answered the sinner handing him some mulled spiced claret, ‘and tell me if you wouldn’t swear.’.

2. the size/rotundity of the stereotypically well-fed clergyman.

(a) a large condom.

[UK]Grose Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue n.p.: Bishop [...] one of the largest of Mrs. Philip’s purses, used to contain the others.
[UK]Lex. Balatronicum.

(b) (US) ? a form of woman’s makeup container.

[US]R.F. Burton City of the Saints 78: She had forgotten her ‘fixins’ [...] a reticule containing a ‘bishop,’ a comb and a pomatum pot.

(c) a bustle.

[US]G.P. Burnham Memoirs of the US Secret Service 219: In the early days, when the ‘bishop’ or ‘bustle’ [...] first came into vogue.

(d) a chamberpot.

[UK]Partridge DSUE (1984) 82/2: C.19–early 20.

(e) (US black/campus) the penis.

implied in shoot a bishop under shoot v.
[US]Baker et al. CUSS 80: Bishop Male sex organ.
[US]Ebonics Primer at 🌐 bishop Definition: a penis Example: So when you gonna sit on my bishop?
[US]Sun. World (SA) 4 Dec. 🌐 Internationally acclaimed gospel singer [...] and pastor Jabu Hlongwane is alledgedly failing to keep his ‘bishop’ zipped in.

(f) (UK Und.) a folding jemmy.

[UK]V. Davis Phenomena in Crime 194: In the legs of her step-ins she concealed a folding jemmy, known as a ‘bishop’.

3. a broken signpost [mild anti-clericalism: it neither points the way nor travels it].

[UK]Partridge DSUE (1984) 82/2: ? mid-C.19–20.

4. a private detective [he ‘searches out sin’].

[UK]P. McCabe Apple to the Core in DSUE (1984).
[UK]Partridge DSUE (8th edn) 82/2: since 1955.

In phrases

bang one’s bishop (v.) (also bash one’s/the bishop, beat the bishop, bop..., capture..., choke..., flip..., flog..., polish...) [ety. unknown, although DSUE suggests a resemblance of the penis to a bishop’s mitre or to the bishop in a trad. designed ‘Staunton’ chess set; however, simple assonance is equally likely/bash v. (1)/bop v. (1)]

to masturbate; thus bishop-bashing n., masturbation.

[US]Goldin et al. DAUL 25/1: Beat the bishop. (P) To masturbate. [Note: The expression takes its meaning from the shape of a bishop’s miter.].
[US]Trimble 5000 Adult Sex Words and Phrases.
[US]Kerouac letter 6 Jan. in Charters II (1999) 447: The Bishop orders you not to beat it too much (Beat the Bishop).
[UK](con. WWII) B. Aldiss Soldier Erect 107: I have to keep on bashing my bishop [...] It’s twitching in my pants. [Ibid.] 156: A hell of a lot too much bishop-bashing.
[US]B. Rodgers Queens’ Vernacular 115: to masturbate [...] beat the bishop [dummy, meat] [...] flog the bishop.
[Ire]J. Morrow Confessions of Proinsias O’Toole 138: Beyond a few sessions of mutual Bishop bashing (a competitive sport called ‘Kentucky Whist’) I emerged as innocent of the ways of Sodom as I’d gone in.
[US]Maledicta IV:2 (Winter) 190: A doodle-dandler is one who flogs the bishop, i.e. wanks off.
[UK]Barr & York Sloane Ranger Hbk 158: banging his bishop v. Masturbate (males).
[US]‘Jennifer Blowdryer’ Modern English 76: masturbation (v): Beating the bishop.
[UK]J. Morton Lowspeak. 🌐 Molest the Muslim, Oralize the Organ, Bang the Buddha, Smack the semite, Beat the Bishop.
‘The World’s Largest Collection of Male Masturbation Synonyms’ at 🌐 Flick on over the thumb / Flicking the bic / Flipping the Bishop.
[UK]Roger’s Profanisaurus in Viz 87 Dec. n.p.: bash-the-bishop euph. To masturbate; toss; bank with Barclays (qv).
[UK] ‘Maxim Thesaurus’, Maxim Jun. 🌐 Polish the bishop: John Paul was late for his appearance, having wasted most of the morning polishing the bishop.
[UK]Guardian Guide 29 Jan.– 4 Feb. 52: The section looking at masturbation (or ‘loping the pony/bopping the bishop/choking the chicken’ etc).
[UK]Sun. Times Mag. 6 Feb. 34: They give you sex magazines to take into the cubicle. I was in there bashing the bishop for six hours. 🌐 What should I do to relieve the frustration I feel, spank the monkey, or beat the Bishop?
‘xpi3’ ‘Male & Female Masturbation Terms’ at 22 Oct. 🌐 Capturing the bishop. 🌐 Now, as I was saying … if the Brothers hafta get horny and clean their pipes, tell ’em its Okay to ‘beat the Bishop,’ hump a sheep, or get a blowjob from a nun. That don’t break no vow of celibacy.
Fat Dancer 🌐 Euphemisms Top 10: 10) One off the wrist. 9) Making baldie puke. 8) Jerkin the gherkin. [...] 1) Flogging the bishop.
[US] 🌐 Bashing The Bishop – All alone on his big, big bed our amateur guy bashes his bishop – WALLOP.
[NZ]Number One Adult Sexual Health Terms Advisor 🌐 Masturbation Slang Male Terms: [...] bashed the bishop.
[US]T. Dorsey Hurricane Punch 129: The whole time we’re getting maximum penance, he’s [i.e. a priest] playing ‘beat the bishop’ with Jimmy O’Toole.
[UK]A. Wheatle Dirty South 8: I reckon quite a few bishops were choked in the boys’ toilets after her lessons. [Ibid.] 125: Men have choked their bishops so much ’cos of chicks like Akeisha that their dicks fall off.