Green’s Dictionary of Slang

instrument n.

1. in sexual contexts.

(a) the vagina.

Chaucer Wife of Bath's Prologue line 149-50: In wyfhod I wol use myn instrument / As frely as my Makere hath it sent.
[UK]Groundworke of Conny-catching Ch. 17: They often gaine some money with their instrument, by such as they sudainely meet withall [...] Thus they trade their liues in lewd lothsome lechery.
[UK]Return from Parnassus Pt II III ii: Her viol-de-gam is her best content; For ’twixt her legs she holds her instrument. Very knavish, very knavish, if you look into it.
[UK] ‘Upon a Courtesan’s Lute’ in Wardroper (1969) 176: Pretty lute, when I am gone / Tell thy mistress here was one / That hither came with full intent / To play upon her instrument.
[UK]‘Du Parc’ (trans.) Comical Hist. of Francion Bk ix 17: [He] advised her, after he had done playing with the Lute, that he could also play on another Instrument. [...] Come to me to morrow to the Wantons Cave, you, without doubt, shall find me there with my Instrument.
[UK]T. Duffet Mock-Tempest III i: Though our Dancing Schooles ruin’d, we have sav’d our Instruments.

(b) the penis; ext. as instrument of copulation/generation/propagation (cf. generation tool n.).

[UK]R. Copland Complaynte of Them that ben To Late Maryed 10: Whan I se her lye in shetes fayre and whyte, [...] With good wyll wolde I take then delyte; / Neuertheles I lete her haue her repose, [...] For thy [i]nstrument is not yet well in poynt.
[UK]R. Scot Witchcraft IV iv: A yoong man lieng with a wench .. . was faine to leave his instruments of venerie behind him, by means of that prestigious art of witchcraft [...] He caught hir by the throte, . . . saieng: Restore me my toole, or thou shalt die for it.
[UK]R. Dallington Colonna 42v: [An] Infant holding his little Instrument in both his hands.... continued pissing into the ... water.
[UK]Middleton Blurt, Master Constable D3: Deere instrument of mannie mens delight, are all these women?
[UK]Webster Duchess of Malfi II ii: There was a young waiting-woman, had a monstrous desire to see the glass-house [...] And it was only to know what strange instrument it was, should swell up a glass to the fashion of a woman’s belly.
[UK]R. Brome New Academy IV i: whi.: Look you, Madam, here is a draught of my marriage-instrument to your lap. eph.: His instrument being drawn, I must put up my pipe and be gone.
[UK]Le Strange Merry Passages and Jeasts No. 114 43: He profered him the kindnesse to gett his wife with child for him, but to draw him and tempt him on, [...] would laye a cheese with him that would make his Instrument come out at her Backe.
[UK]Mercurius Fumigosus 68 5-12 Sept. 3: Her Husband in a suspicious rage [...] found her at cuddle me cuddle with a young Gallant, he being with the Instrument of Generation fathoming the well.
[UK]Etherege She Would if She Cou’d III iii: A poor Fidler [...] takes more delight in scraping / Upon his old squeaking Fiddle, then I do in fumbling / On that domestick Instrument of mine.
[UK]Eve Revived 53: [of a dildo] The Figure of that Instrument Furnished ’em with tickling Ideas [...] I shall pass over in Silence what they did with that instrument.
[UK]Dryden Juvenal VI 106: Into the Fair with Women mixt, he went, Arm’d with a huge two-handed Instrument; A grateful Present to those holy Quires, Where the Mouse guilty of his Sex retires.
[UK]N. Ward London Spy VI 126: The Doctor undertook to extinguish [...] all Venereal Fires that had unhappily taken hold of the Instruments of Generation.
[UK] ‘I’le o’re Bogie we him’ in Chappell Roxburghe Ballads (1880) III 277: He laid me down upon my back, and all my Buttocks bair, And he pull’d out an Instrument, that coued me to a Hair.
[UK]N. Ward Whole Pleasures of Matrimony 88: Take the just Dimensions of your Husband’s Instrument of Generation, both as to Length and Compass.
[UK]Dialogue between a Married Lady and a Maid II: Taking his Left-hand, and putting his Member into it, take, my dearest Tullia, said he, a better and pleasanter Instrument.
[UK]Cleland Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure (1985) 25: That instrument, from which the instinct of nature [...] now strongly informed me, I was to expect that supreme pleasure which she has placed in the meeting of those parts so admirably fitted for each other.
[UK]G. Stevens ‘A Fore-Castle Song’ Songs Comic and Satyrical 97: Our instruments always do wonders.
[Ire] ‘Daniel M’Clean’s Guaging Instrument’ Songs (publ. Monaghan) 2: The new fashion’d instrument I’ve got for guaging [...] Where any young maiden that makes application, / To ease her vexation.
[UK]Bacchanalian Mag. 95: As for poor Catgut’s instrument, she much the same did soften — /’Cause she is apt, as I have heard, to cry encore too often.
Lustful Turk in Mills (1983) 229: So powerfully did his ravishing instrument stir up nature within me, that by mere instinct I returned him kiss for kiss.
[UK] ‘What Will You Do When I Get You In Bed’ Ticklish Minstrel 16: With that long instrument and its ruby nose so red?
[US]Whip & Satirist of NY & Brooklyn (NY) 2 July n.p.: Dentists [...] My longest instrument I must / Pop in at once to give you ease; / But if I hurt you in the thrust, / Do tell of it, of you please.
[UK]T. Rowlandson Pretty Little Games (1872) plate ix: His amorous sword of pleasure draws, / Blest instrument in natures cause.
[UK] ‘Lady Pokingham’ in Pearl 9 Mar. 29: Placing herself right over him [she] gradually sheathed his grand instrument within her longing cunt.
[UK]Randiana on asstr.org 🌐 My father and younger brothers all boasting instruments of enormous build.
[UK]C. Pearl in Blatchford Memoirs (1983) 56: Running my tongue up his instrument and parting my lips to slip it between them.
[UK]Forbidden Fruit n.p.: There's only one way to make your instrument lay down, but you must wait till I come to bed.
[US]Kate Percival Life & Amours (1967) I 25: Her vagina clasped his instrument so tightly.
[UK]Lustful Memoirs of a Young and Passionated Girl 40: Placing the head of his instrument in the proper place he let it remain there a moment while he tightened his clasp about her.
[US] in P. Smith Letter from My Father (1978) 195: I took my cock out – it was big and hard – I was proud of that instrument.
[US]L. Kramer Faggots 141: He’d met Hubie and Hubie’s eleven-inch wonderful instrument.

2. (US Und.) the pickpocket who actually takes the object from the victim.

[US]Wash. Times (DC) 14 Sept. 10/4: Instrument— One who picks the pocket of a man.
[US]F.H. Tillotson How I Became a Detective 92: Instrument – One who picks the pocket of a man.
[US]Wash. Post 11 Nov. Miscellany 3/4: The ‘wire,’ or ‘booster,’ ‘tool’ and the ‘swell instrument’ were names given to various members of the same mob to designate their relations to each other.
[US](con. 1905–25) E.H. Sutherland Professional Thief (1956) 45: The third operation is to put the duke (hand) down and extract the poke (pocketbook). The person who does this is known as the hook, wire, tool, or instrument.
[US]D. Dressler Parole Chief 245: This man [who picks the pocket] is called [...] a ‘hook,’ ‘tool,’ ‘wire,’ or instrument.’.

In compounds

instrument-case (n.)

3. a condom.

[UK]R. King New London Spy 51: That valuable member of society [...] who sells preservative instrument-cases of all sizes.