Green’s Dictionary of Slang

1. to tamper with, to falsify; thus cook the books, cook the accounts; thus cooking n., tampering, falsifying.

1636		Earl Of Strafford Letters II (1739) 16: The Proof was once clear, however they have cook’d it since.
1851		Cardiff & Merthyr Guardian 5 Apr. 3/4: The public had heard a great deal of ‘cooking accounts’: it had become a slang term.
1856		Punch XXXI 189: It is remarkable especially for the facilities it offers for cooking the accounts, as it entirely prevents any possibility of checking them.
1863		C. Reade Hard Cash II 25: You have cooked the books in time.
1872		H. Spencer Study of Sociology (9th edn) 119: The dishonesty implied in the adulterations of tradesmen and manufacturers... in cooking of railway accounts and financial prospectuses [F&H].
1880		Bulletin (Sydney) 13 Mar. 1/4: This was very rough on the Anglican Church; but it is necessary to remember that the warder was a real Roman Catholic and wanted to ‘cook’ the gaol statistics to suit His Grace Archbishop Vaughan.
1883		Bristol Magpie 2 June 5/1: [T]he chairman [...] suavely implying [...] that the accounts in question had been ‘cooked.
1891		T.B. Reed Cock House Fellsgarth 213: ‘Do you mean to insinuate that I’ve taken the club money! [...] Or that I was going to cook the accounts so that it should not be known?’.
1895		Crowe Aus. Sl. Dict. 19: Cooked Accounts, an unfair statement.
1909		Wodehouse Mike [ebook] ‘If I were one of those Napoleons of Finance [...] I should cook the accounts, I suppose, and embezzle stamps to an incredible amount’.
1919		‘Sapper’ Mufti 223: I believe the men would willingly agree to that if they were [...] sure he wasn’t cooking his books.
1924		D. Hammett ‘Who Killed Bob Teal?’ in Nightmare Town (2001) 267: Your husband had been cooking the books for some time.
1934		Wodehouse Right Ho, Jeeves 188: Accusing the latter of having cooked the marks.
1943		R. Llewellyn None But the Lonely Heart 42: Everybody knew them machines was cooked.
1973		B.S. Johnson All Bull 209: I found that the man before me had been cooking the wardroom wine accounts.
1984		P. Slabolepszy ‘Under the Oaks’ in Mooi Street (1994) 26: It’s a bladdy racket. A cooking of books.
1997		N. Barlay Curvy Lovebox 125: So Tax [...] star’ doin’ a little cookin’.
2001		K. Waterhouse Soho 193: Once in a blue moon he comes in early to cook the books.
2002		R.G. Barrett Mystery Bay Blues 76: A law firm [...] where the lawyers were cooking the books.
2010		D. Whish-Wilson Line of Sight [ebook] ‘What do you make of the story about Cooper cooking the books?’.

2. to ruin, to spoil; to cheat.

1849		Bell’s Life in Sydney 22 Dec. 3/2: Here’s a discharge he gave me on the 17th. that will cook him, I think.
1858		A. Mayhew Paved with Gold 357: Suppose they should think I have bolted, and break open my trunks? [...] That would about cook me up.
1861		(con. 1840s–50s) H. Mayhew London Labour and London Poor III 350/2: When the clarences, the cabs that carry four, come in, they cooked the hackney-coachmen in no time.
1880		Nat. Police Gaz. (NY) 13 Nov. 2/3: This witness had been ‘cooked’ — had been ‘done up brown’ — by [...] his employer.
1885		Bulletin (Sydney) 21 Feb. 6/2: The ‘Continental Gossip’ of that darling ‘Stella’ […], is bound to cook us, in the end.
1890		‘Rolf Boldrewood’ Colonial Reformer I 76: Never knew one of ’em that didn’t take to drink sooner or later; and, in course, that cooked ’em.
1900		Bulletin (Sydney) 24 Mar. 28/1: The Theatre Francais, the burning of which is cabled, was a played-out institution. Three things, within the last 20 years, have been enough to ‘cook’ it.
1903		E.W. Townsend Sure 48: ‘Do not be led astray by boys what [...] dig tings out of books. Dey [...] cooks deir college standing by such weakness’.
1941		K. Tennant Battlers 226: Take me eyes off ye for two minutes and you try to cook the whole show.
1960		J.D. Macdonald Slam the Big Door (1961) 56: Rob Raines felt his face grow hot. A thing like that [...] could cook you for good.

3. to give someone their due deserts.

1851		Bell’s Life in Sydney 26 Apr. 2/6: ‘Good boy,’ shouted the brums, ‘That’s the way to cook him’.
1877		Five Years’ Penal Servitude 128: Seeing how the fellow was acting he sent him two ‘shise’ notes, which gave him a dose that ‘cooked’ him.

4. to suffer from the heat.

1937–84		Partridge DSUE (1984) 251/1: from ca. 1860.
1959		C. Himes Crazy Kill 60: Friends who had come to bury big Joe [...] but were being cooked instead.
1978		Eble Campus Sl. Apr. 2: cook – to get sunburned.
2000		Hip-Hop Connection Jan. 69: Turn the fecking heating down next time [...] We was cooking.

5. (Aus.) to die by hanging.

1885

Bulletin (Sydney) 13 Jun. 22/1: The bolt was drawn, the drop fell, and the idiotic little Tester went through! With all Nosey Bob’s assurances, however, he took some time to ‘cook.’ The rope was badly adjusted, and the idiot, thus lightly pronounced sane, kicked in the air for many, many minutes.

6. in the preparation or consumption of drugs; occas. alcohol.

7. to overcome.

1888		‘Rolf Boldrewood’ Robbery Under Arms (1922) 395: Miss Falkland came forward and held out her beautiful hand to me [...] It very nigh cooked me.
1952		W.R. Burnett Little Men, Big World 78: If it cooks, we’re in clover.
2011		W.D. Myers Cruisers: Checkmate 94: ‘Jamie Pullman played the King’s Gambit against a master last week and cooked him’.

8. to bribe, to arrange illicitly.

1872		G.P. Burnham Memoirs of the US Secret Service 71: He had sought out the Government witnesses and ‘cooked’ all he could find access to.
1938		L. Ortzen Down Donkey Row 139: The fight’s cooked – I kin beat this boy wiv one ’and. I’m backin’ meself [...] but keep it dark.

9. (US) to kill, to murder; lit. and fig.

1899		Kipling ‘The Moral Reformers’ in Complete Stalky & Co. (1987) 127: Come on, Campbell. Let’s cook ’em.
1906		A.H. Lewis Confessions of a Detective 25: ‘Settle the bull, Red! Go in and cook him!’ I might add that ‘settle’ and ‘cook,’ in the language of the Five Points, always mean ‘kill’ and never mean anything else.
1914		Truth (Melbourne) 3 Jan. 11/6: You have cooked your Catherine this time. I am poisoned.
1927		H.C. Witwer Classics in Sl. 57: He feels certain that he can take Cyclone Duncan in a fifteen round fight, whereas if he cooks him at his own house he will only get the chair.
1934		R. Sale ‘A Nose for News’ in Goulart (1967) 221: Shut your mouth, damn you [...] or I’ll cook you right now!
1965		C. Himes Cotton Comes to Harlem (1967) 189: ‘This cooks him,’ Grave Digger said.
1981		H. Gould Fort Apache, The Bronx 159: They would take one look at the Seville, the cashmere coat, and they would cook him.
1984		LaBarge & Holt Sweetwater Gunslinger 201 (1990) 222: Sweetwater told Jeff about the time Slim and Sundance ‘cooked’ the Russian ship.

10. (also cook up) used fig. to cover any activity.

1846		Swell’s Night Guide 75: One of the combatants cuts the other [...] which soon cooks up a chaff and a snarly – that some of the party get shirty and narkish.
1861		(con. 1840s–50s) H. Mayhew London Labour and London Poor I 214/2: ‘Cooked’ assassinations and sudden deaths of eminent individuals.
1900		Boy’s Own Paper 29 Dec. 198: It’s been a first-rate place for cooking our little plan.
1905		‘Hugh McHugh’ You Can Search Me 16: I’ve got a scheme cooking that will put you and me all to the splendid.
1950		H. Ellson Tomboy (1952) 111: You’re supposed to get in with girls from other clubs and tell us what’s cooking around.
1955		R. Graziano Somebody Up There Likes Me (1956) 280: My manager might show up with some guy he’s cooking a movie deal with.
1964		H.S. Thompson letter 25 June in Proud Highway (1997) 458: This is what I have cooking at the moment.
1975		E. Torres Carlito’s Way 62: If they got a big deal cooking they get a job done.
1998		D. Jenkins Rude Behavior 159: The agent promised to do everything in her power to see that Shake’s book stayed on the [best-seller] list for as long as possible, but in the meantime they ought to ‘cook.’ .
2001		K. Sampson Outlaws (ms.) 6: Big Moby’s buzzing his nuts off. He knows there’s something cooking.

11. (Aus.) to render drunk.

1910

Truth (Perth) 1 Oct. 4/7: You will ‘jerry’ when they tell, / Bishop Wright, / Of some ‘silvertail’ or ‘swell’ / Who got ‘tight,’ / That the ‘tanglefoot was crook,’ / And they ‘had him on a hook’ / Where ‘bazaar-maids’ help to ‘cook’ / Us at night.

12. (US) to concoct a mendacious story or duplicitous scheme.

1917		Van Loan ‘Playing Even with Obadiah’ in Old Man Curry 53: Them Irish jockeys had a story all cooked to tell.
1930		M. Fiaschetti You Gotta Be Rough 211: She [...] cooked the scheme of using brother-in-law Rullo and little Rebecca to fool detectives that might be on the trail.

13. (US) to die or execute in the electric chair.

1931–4		D. Clemmer Prison Community (1940) 331/1: cook, vt. [...] 2. To kill by legal electrocution.
1949		Monteleone Criminal Sl. (rev. edn).
a.1953		‘Death Row’ in D. Wepman et al. Life (1976) 118: Serve it raw, punk. The chair’ll do the cooking.
1965		C. Brown Manchild in the Promised Land (1969) 230: It seemed like a whole lot of people in the neighborhood [...] were being cooked in Sing Sing.
1971		B. Malamud Tenants (1972) 59: Ellery is cooked to death in Sing Sing.
1995		P. Cornwell From Potter’s Field (1996) 382: The asshole needs to go to Virginia and get cooked.

14. (US) to be electrocuted.

1934

H. Roth Call It Sleep (1977) 423: ‘Five hundred an’ fifty volts. What a wallop!’ ‘He’s cooked, yuh t’ink?’.

15. (US black) to do something exceptionally well.

1960, 1975		(ref. to 1940) Wentworth & Flexner DAS 121/1: Usu. in ‘Now you’re cooking,’ said approvingly.
1964		R.S. Gold Jazz Lex. xxii: Contrasting with the extravagant descriptiveness of jazz nouns, adjectives, and adverbs is the spareness of its verbs, most of which are action verbs, e.g., blow, cook, cop, dig, jump, knock, latch on, make, pick up, and put down.
1977		C. McFadden Serial 23: Suffused with a happy glow because his party was really cooking.
1978		R. Charles Brother Ray 20: I was a specially hot weaver, and I could really cook with that cane.
1984		D. Jenkins Life Its Ownself 231: Somewhere, sometime, on every project that had any merit something clicked, visibility improved, and everybody started to ‘cook’ .
1985		J. Wambaugh Secrets of Harry Bright (1986) 150: ‘Five for Otto!’ Archie said, writing his score on the steering-wheel card holder. ‘Now you’re cooking, kiddo.’.

16. (orig. US black) of a musician or group of musicians, to be playing in harmony, particularly creatively; to be in mutual understanding.

1963		M. Braly Shake Him Till He Rattles (1964) 40: They were in their shirt sleeves, sitting on wooden folding chairs. And they were cooking! He sat down to listen.
1971		(con. 1930s) D. Wells Night People 65: ‘Shake me, daddy. I’m not with you.’ ‘ I mean, rang her bell.’ ‘Now, we’re cooking. Carry on.’.
1988		D.D. Harrison Black Pearls 177: The instrumental work [. . .] does fairly cook as they bounce the improvised melodies among themselves.
1994		G. Pelecanos Shoedog 173: ‘The show’s really going to cook, sweetheart. I mean it’s really going to cook’.
2005		W.D. Myers Autobiog. of My Dead Brother 81: Then C.J. came in on the piano and you could see them straighten up. C.J. was cooking from the get-go.

17. (Aus.) to scold; to criticize harshly.

1967		‘The Whisper All Aussie Dict.’ in Kings Cross Whisper (Sydney) xxxiii 4/4: cook: To downgrade a person.
1983		R. Aven-Bray Ridgey-Didge Oz Jack Lang 22: Cook Castigate.
1990		Tupper & Wortley Aus. Prison Sl. Gloss. 🌐 Cook. 1. To criticise.

18. to start or rev up a car.

1994		G. Pelecanos Shoedog 47: He dropped into the driver’s side of the bench, moved the seat back, and cooked the ignition.
1997		(con. 1970s) G. Pelecanos King Suckerman (1998) 263: Goodrich cooked the 327 and pulled away from the curb.
2005		G. Pelecanos Drama City 234: He cooked the ignition and headed for Park View.
2012		G. Pelecanos (con. 1972) What It Was 16: Jones pointed to the keys hanging in theignotion. ‘Cook it, Coco’.

19. to be burnt to death.

1985		J. Wambaugh Secrets of Harry Bright (1986) 109: Turns out he was shot in the head before he got cooked.
1995		G. Cuomo Couple of Cops 190: Since the medics on the [fire] scene hadn’t found any sign of wounds and beating, and neither body had — in the parlance — been cooked, it was assumed that they’d died of smoke inhalation.