touch, v.¹ — Green’s Dictionary of Slang

touch v.¹

1. to take money into one’s own hands, to steal; often as touch (someone) for

1614		Jonson Bartholomew Fair IV iii: How now, lime-twig? Hast thou touched?
1728		Vanbrugh & Cibber Provoked Husband II i: A man touches money (obtains it), a new sense of the word.
1749		Smollett (trans.) Adventures of Gil Blas I 192: All that I have been able to touch, being no more than three thousand ducats.
1771		Smollett Humphrey Clinker (1925) II 134: England, I conceive, may touch about one million sterling a year.
1788		J. O’Keeffe Farmer 46: I’ll touch his Cash, and then get rid of him.
1796		J.G. Holman Abroad and At Home I iii: I could not go abroad without her, so I touch’d father’s cash.
1807		H. Tufts Autobiog. (1930) 293: Touching a cly signifies robbing a pocket.
1821		D. Haggart Autobiog. 14: I was standing by him with my arms across, and in that position touched him of his screave.
1833		H. Smith Gale Middleton 1 150: It’s a prime job for us, already, for we are to touch five-and-twenty guineas a-piece.
1833		S. Smith Major Downing (1834) 170: I knew if they touched you they would get the wrong pig by the ear.
1841		Sydney Herald 26 Oct. 2/4: Mr Rennie gave an immense number of examples of similar slang [...] to touch the ready, for to ‘receive money’.
1846		Swell’s Night Guide 58: Stunning place – bona shicksters, and clys worth touching, eh, cully?
1848		‘Ned Buntline’ Mysteries and Miseries of N.Y. I 34: He [...] is as daring a cove as ever cracked a crib, touched a dummy, or palmed a glisten.
1857		Paul Pry (London 15 Aug. n.p.: [of a prostitute] ‘Can you touch now, my love?’ You can't be doing any good in the doorway, so late of an evening.
1859		Matsell Vocabulum.
1865		Leaves from Diary of Celebrated Burglar 135/2: Stryke mi luckky, iv we ’avent ‘touched’ this tyme!
1867		Nat. Police Gaz. (NY) 21 Sept. n.p.: I ‘twigged’ them [i.e. a gang of pickpockets] ‘ramp’ a pair of opera-glasses from a ‘rep’ and thank that is all that they ‘touched’.
1879		‘Autobiog. of a Thief’ in Macmillan’s Mag. (London) XL 502: I went out at the game three or four times a week, and used to touch almost every time.
1880		Tamworth Herald (Staffs.) 24 Jan. 6/5: I went to Croydon and touched for a red toy (gold watch) and red tackle (gold chain) with a large locket. I took them in and we got canon.
1883		Nat. Police Gaz. (NY) 3 Nov. 6/1: ‘Touch him on women — or faro — and he’ll squal like a son of a gun’.
1885		Bulletin (Sydney) 31 Oct. 10/4: Twenty ‘quid’ or more he had. Some men would ’a took the lot. I just took a couple and put the rest back. It wouldn’t do, y’ know to ‘cop’ ’em all, ’cause if he’d wake up and found he was ‘touched’ and I had any notes on me, I’d a got into trouble.
1892		H. Lawson ‘In a Dry Season’ in Roderick (1972) 81: Some blank had ‘touched’ his blanky overcoat. The overcoat had a cheque for ten ‘quid’ in the pocket.
1895		E. Townsend Chimmie Fadden Explains 113: Dere dey stood wid dere mouts open, dere coats open, and der jackets open; dead marks for crooks t’ touch.
1897		Mirror of Life 2 June 3/3: Harry Cannon being ‘touched’ for his red lot and tackle before racing at Salisbury Meeting.
1900		Flynt & Walton Powers That Prey 4: What he wanted really was to ‘touch’ the little sum which was coming to him.
1912		D. Lowrie My Life in Prison 149: Some ‘con’ muster ‘touched’ me for them.
1916		O.O. McIntyre New York Day By Day 25 Oct. [synd. col.] I’ve been robbed [...] This woman has touched me for my roll of $600.
1923		Smith’s Wkly (Sydney) 2 June 21/1: Last night he ‘touched’ a Scotch politician for his presentation ‘thimble and slang’.
1926		N. Lucas London and its Criminals 250: Hardly a week passes but some dupe is ‘touched’ by some fresh trick.
1931		Irwin Amer. Tramp and Und. Sl. 190: Touch.– To rob, especially the person.
1936		Queenslander (Brisbane) 2 July 4/4: So, out to crop the wisdom I did sow, And with much daring took a ‘gay’ in tow. / But this was all the harvest that I reaped, / I touch the ‘mug’ - he squeals - and in I go!
1948		J. Archibald ‘Klump a la Carte’ Popular Det. July 🌐 A swanky joint on Park Avenue was touched for sixty grand worth of jewels.
1950		P. Hoskins No Hiding Place! 192/2: Touched. Brought off a coup.
1950		S.J. Baker in Sun. Herald (Sydney) 8 June 9/2: Most of these are small-time criminals. When they are pulled in by the police, often enough it is because they have [...] ‘touched a kick’ or ‘worked a standover,’ all of which describe various forms of theft.
2001		N. Barlay Hooky Gear 170: He wants . . . you to . . . touch a load outside of . . . Tilbury. Meanin wha? Meaning hijack . . . it. Steal it.
2001		D. Looser Boobslang [U. Canterbury D.Phil. thesis] 192/2: touch v. to steal.
2013		T. Peacock More You Bet 58: A punter claiming [...] to have been paid short of the required amount might claim that he has been ‘touched’ or ‘robbed’.

2. to offer a loan.

1760

Foote The Minor 49: I totter’d away to Nebuchadnezzar Zebolon, in the old Jewry, but it happen’d to be Saturday; and they [i.e. Jews] never touch on the Sabbath.

3. to borrow something, usu. money, from, to cadge; often as touch (someone) for

1749		Smollett (trans.) Adventures of Gil Blas I 207: If by your means I could touch a little money.
1785, 1788, 1796		Grose Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue n.p.: touch [...] to get money from any one.
1797		Sporting Mag. Jan. IX 214/1: I touch’d father’s cash, and resolv’d to finish my education.
1811		Lex. Balatronicum.
1825		Age (London) 7 Aug. 100/3: He vins all he can, and then touches, d’ye see.
1870		Sportsman (London) ‘Notes on News’ 29 Sept. 2/1: It is no joke for man to be ‘touched’ for a cool thouaand or so, if he happens to occupy a good social position.
1882		Sydney Sl. Dict. 10/2: Lame Jack is pattering. He pads Pitt and George streets and the Parks, and touches coves on the blob.
1886		Sporting Times 9 Jan. 1/5: The welsher’s favourite sport, ‘Touch and go’.
1899		Morn. Bulletin (Rockhampton, Qld) 25 Sept. 3/4: He will [...] ‘touch’ the cook in the morning for a supply of rations; and perhaps successfully ‘chew his ear’ for a bit of tobacco.
1900		Flynt & Walton Powers That Prey 213: Ain’t you got no one you can touch?
1900		H.B. Norris [perf. Vesta Tilley] ‘Burlington Bertie’ 🎵 A girl wants a brooch or a new diamond ring / [...] / Or sees a new bonnet she likes oh! So much / Her simple remark is, ‘Now who can I touch?’.
1905		Sun. Times (Perth) 15 Oct. 1/5: An impecunious statesman touched seventeen cobbers to pay a wine account.
1914		Joyce ‘Counterparts’ Dubliners (1956) 90: The fog had begun to chill him and he wondered could he touch Pat in O’Neill’s. He could not touch him for more than a bob – and a bob was no use.
1916		J. Lait ‘One Touch of Art’ Beef, Iron and Wine (1917) 208: ‘You’re the sixt’ actor I starts to burgle to-night what tries to touch me.’ ‘If you could lend me a dollar till Tuesday—’.
1919		N.Z. Free Lance 30 Jan. 16/1: He had struck the pub at sundown, and had ‘touched’ us for a drink.
1922		‘Sapper’ Black Gang 436: When the wives of millionaires are touched to the heart, my experience is that the husbands are generally touched to the pocket.
1934		Gettysberg Times (PA) 3 Dec. 3/4: ‘Where do you suppose he got that five hundred pounds from?’ [...] ‘He must [have] been touching for a bit on account’.
1936		Wodehouse Young Men in Spats 10: ‘If I had [more money] I shouldn’t be touching you for a fiver’.
1950		K. Amis letter 20 June in Leader (2000) 234: Sorry to ask abt. the money, but there’s nobody I can touch here.
1959		F. Norman Fings I i: I fort I was goin’ to touch yer.
1972		J. McNeill Old Familiar Juice (1973) 8782: And there’s many a sob from the passing-by mob / as she touches each bloke for a zac.
1990		(con. early 1950s) J. Ellroy L.A. Confidential 286: Who do you want me to touch?

4. to inherit money.

1796

T. Morton Way to Get Married in Inchbold (1808) XXV 13: I hear his daughter will touch to the tune of thirty thousand pounds.

5. (also touch off) to pick someone’s pocket.

1846		N.Y. Herald 2 Oct. 2/5: ‘Touched’ of a Watch. [headline] [...] some expert ‘knuck’ managed to draw [a man’s] ‘thimble’ or in other words his silver lever watch, gold fob chain and key.
1849		G.G. Foster N.Y. in Slices 21: Here, too, the handsome and dashing Cyprians who have been complained of for ‘touching’ a country merchant, a parish clergyman, or a green Congressman on his way home.
1865		Leaves from Diary of Celebrated Burglar 70/2: It was no use trying to ‘touch’ her at the break of the boat as she would jerk away from anything approaching to closeness of position.
1896		H. Blossom Checkers 5: Keep your eye on your watch and your money, or you’ll get ‘touched.’.
1901		C.R. Wooldridge Hands Up! 53: Even while in jail [...] merely to ‘keep in trim,’ as she styles it, she will ‘touch’ the watches and jewelry of visitors and others.
1904		Illus. Police News 31 Dec. 11/3: I was outside the ‘boozer’ (public-house) when they ‘touched’ (took the chain).
1916		‘Thieves’ Sl.’ Toronto Star 19 Jan. 2/5: TO PICK A POCKET To nick, to touch.
1922		Smith’s Wkly (Sydney) 2 Dec. 18/2: Well, we got on the rattler all right [...] I ‘touched’ a parson in the corridor but it was a dead ‘blue’.
1932		New Call (Perth, WA) 21 Apr. 12/7: [A] young woman [...] informed the company that she had just ‘touched off’ a ‘gay’ which I learned meant that she had picked a man’s pocket.
1939		Howsley Argot: Dict. of Und. Sl.

6. (US) to defeat a bookmaker; to win a bet.

1896

H. Blossom Checkers 34: Anyway, I’m glad we touched them, and we’ll take good care that they do n’t get it back.

7. (Aus.) to swindle, to cheat; usu. as touch (someone) for

1885		Bulletin (Sydney) 7 Mar. 14/1: Tumut horses won four out of the five races on the card, so, judging by the groans, the Tumutians must have touched the locals to a good figure.
1910		Sporting Times 8 Jan. 1/5: A little Saturday-afternoon Sheeny, who had had a quid on, was touching the bookie.
1949		L. Glassop Lucky Palmer 70: ‘This bloke’s a copper.’ ‘All the more reason to touch the mug.’.
1985		R.G. Barrett You Wouldn’t Be Dead for Quids (1989) 98: If I don’t buy them he will and at least that way we’ll make sure he doesn’t get touched.

8. to ask for a favour.

1930		(con. 1914–18) Brophy & Partridge Songs and Sl. of the British Soldier.
1948		(con. 1944) N. Mailer Naked and Dead 616: When a pal has hit it, y’ don’t touch hum unless he asks ya.

9. to donate, to raise money (for).

1999

J. Cameron Brown Bread in Wengen [ebook] When I came out of nick all my mates got together and touched me that flat.

In phrases

didn’t touch the sides (v.)

1. used in the context of intercourse with a vagina that has supposedly been stretched by a extra-large penis (and thus fails to stimulate a normal one.

1972

E. Shrake Strange Peaches 138: ‘You go first,’ he said to me. ‘If I went first none of you kids could touch the sides’.

2. of a drink, to be swallowed at great speed.

2018

J.-P. Jordan Joys of War 50: I walked straight up to the bar, jumped the queue and all [...] 2 pints of Guinness please. The first one didn’t touch the sides.

touch lucky (v.) (also touch luck)

to experience good fortune.

1924		(con. WWI) A.G. Pretty Gloss. Sl. [...] in the A.I.F. 1921–1924 (rev. t/s) n.p.: touch – [...] to touch lucky, to have a stroke of luck.
1929		(con. c.1910) J.B. Booth London Town 304: I’ve touched lucky the last couple o’ days.
1938		J. Curtis They Drive by Night 47: Might touch lucky though. You never know.
1947		L.J. Valentine Night Stick 208: It was Lieutenant Mason who touched luck and cleansed the community of a gang of cut-throat thieves.
1956		J. Curtis Look Long Upon a Monkey 66: We ain’t half touched lucky.

touch off (v.)

see sense 5

touch one’s/the kick (v.) (also touch one’s/the pants, …strides, ...tweeds) [SE touch + kick n.⁴/ SE pants/strides n. (1)/SE tweeds] (N.Z.)

1. to pay for a round of drinks.

1955		B.J. Cameron Collection (TS July)n.p.: touch one’s strides (v) To pay for a round [DNZE].
1962		‘Hori’ Half-gallon Jar 23: This side-of-the-mouth coot says for me to touch the pants first, so I say, ‘O.K. Five beers please.’ [Ibid.] 75: There is all sorts of plonk, and the little joker tells me to touch my kick [to shout]... I think all the others have death adders in their pockets, ’cause not one of them touches his tweeds [DNZE].
1971		P. Newton Ten Thousand Dogs 169: Touch the kick: To pay out money, put your hand in your pocket [DNZE].

2. to make a small loan or contribution.

1939		Williamstown Chron. (Vic.) 15 Apr. 2/4: But if ever I get the ‘low down’ on residents or others who ‘hoist’ sand from the beach when they can well afford to ‘touch their kick,’ I’ll not let up; copper or no copper.
1988		McGill Dict. of Kiwi Sl. 114/2: touch your kick a modest loan, a ‘kick’ being old word for sixpence.
2003		McGill Reed Dict. of N.Z. Sl. [as cit. 1988].

touch (someone) for (v.)

1. to cadge, to seek and/or extract a loan (from someone).

1887		Bulletin (Sydney) 15 Oct. 9/2: But one soft summer’s eve, a weary and perhaps ‘tangled’ stranger, misled by directions, struck the homestead of Mr. Anderson, and, thinking he was addressing Dickey the Lamb, endeavoured to ‘touch him’ for the usual donation of flour, and tea, and tough old mutton.
1893		Sun (NY) 27Mar. 7/1: One night he went to touch her for some cash.
1898		Binstead & Wells Pink ’Un and Pelican 96: I touched old Jim Mace for a cuple o’ bob on’y lst night.
1899		W.J. Kountz Billy Baxter’s Letters 57: I touched Johnny Black’s brother-in-law for fifty.
1903		A. Binstead Pitcher in Paradise 183: Bob had taken the bank for ten pounds an’ touched a pefec’ stranger for a pony to open it with.
1909		W. Irwin Confessions of a Con Man 181: Slippery Sills coming off a brake-beam to touch me for a five.
1911		L. Stone Jonah 225: His watery blue eyes [...] told him in an instant whether the owner was a likely mark that he could touch for a drink.
1924		(con. 1880–1924) F.J. Wilstach Anecdota erótica 33: What’s the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a stranger touching you for a fiver. The v.c. has a sudden force while the stranger has a f— sauce.
1936		W. Holtby South Riding (1988) 288: His brother touched him for fifty quid.
1943		J. Phelan Letters from the Big House 14: I wanna touch him for a stake.
1943		M. Harrison Reported Safe Arrival 126: We oughter clean up big on this caper [...] Be all right to touch fer a flim apiece, eh?
1945		‘Henry Green’ Loving (1978) 39: Mr Eldon had touched the Captain for larger and larger amounts.
1956		‘Raymond Thorp’ Viper 172: They knew I would try to touch them for a smoke or a fix.
1964		A. Bennett God the Stonebreaker 177: I always feel he’s going to touch me for a loan. I reckon he’s some kind of spiv or bum.
1977		(con. 1941) R. Beilby Gunner 237: ‘How’re you holding?’ [...] ‘I’m putting the bite on you,’ Gunner explained gently. ‘Puttin the nips in, touching you for a loan.’.
1987		‘Joe Bob Briggs’ Joe Bob Goes to the Drive-In 150: Touched him for another few hundred.
1993		R. Shell Iced 69: Some hitters I knew started coming by touching on me for a hit.

2. to remove, to take, to steal.

1767		G. Colman Oxonian in Town I ii: He suspects nothing. We shall touch him for a few thousands.
1793		Bacchanalian Mag. 18: He touch’d him for his reader.
c.1800		‘The Dustman’s Delight’ in Holloway & Black I (1975) 87: The queer cull was done rumly and touched for his bit.
1879		‘Autobiog. of a Thief’ in Macmillan’s Mag. (London) XL 501: The next day I took the rattler to Forest Hill and touched for (succeeded in getting) some wedge and a kipsy full of clobber (clothes).
1887		‘Dagonet’ ‘A Plank Bed Ballad ’ in Referee 12 Feb. n.p.: If I pipe a good chat, why, I touch for the wedge, / But I’m not a ‘particular’ robber.
1896		A. Morrison Child of the Jago (1982) 151: He tramped the northern suburbs from three o’clock till dark, but touched for nothing.
1908		B. Fisher A. Mutt in Blackbeard Compilation (1977) 121: Somebody touched me for my watch but I don’t care.
1915		Wodehouse Psmith Journalist (1993) 339: What I propose to do [...] is to touch you for the good round sum of five thousand and three dollars.
1924		G. Henderson Keys to Crookdom 421: Touch him for his poke – steal his purse.
1938		F.D. Sharpe Sharpe of the Flying Squad 239: One of my inspectors saw Bob take a purse from a man’s hip pocket as he was getting on a tram [...] The inspector went up and sat next to him and said: ‘Well, Bob, I see you’ve touched for one.’.
1954		J. Phelan Tramp at Anchor 180: I touched for the bastard’s three-slip o’ snout.
1996		P. Howard The Joy (2015) [ebook] [I]nventing sinister reasons for them being there and carrying the bags and briefcases he was always fantasising about ‘touching for’.

3. (Aus.) to swindle, to cheat.

1897		E.W. Townsend Chimmie Fadden 49: She says we was farmers not t’ touch him for fifty instead of twenty-five.
1902		E. Townsend Chimmie Fadden and Mr Paul 67: Duchess would stop some of de tricks she woiks to touch me for all de boodle I earns or wins.
1935		S. Horler London’s Und. 105: He touched me for a tenner, but it was worth it to watch his technique.
1965		F.J. Hardy Yarns of Billy Borker 54: To the haves shall be given and the have-nots shall be touched for their last penny.

touch up (v.)

see separate entry.

SE in slang uses

In compounds

touch-off (n.) [SE touch off, to spark a fire]

(US Und.) an act of arson, a fire; thus touch-off man n., an arsonist.

1915		Eve. Star (Wash., DC) 6 June 39/1: If that [...] ‘touch-off man’ did not show himself at onme get-away, he must show himself at the other.
1929		Hostetter & Beesley It’s a Racket! 241: touch off — An incendiary fire.
1931		G. Milburn ‘Convicts’ Jargon’ in AS VI:6 441: touch-off man, n. A worker for an arson mob.
1949		Monteleone Criminal Sl. (rev. edn) 242: touch-off A fire set by an incendiary.

In phrases

can’t touch the sides

a coarse joke referring to a large, and thus loose, vagina or anus, used by both hetero- and homosexuals.

1979

Maledicta III:2 232: He also may or may not know the following words and expressions: [...] be loose [...] and jokes about you can’t touch the sides and the tightness of the hole.

couldn’t touch someone with a ten-foot pole (v.)

(US) to be inferior to someone.

1974

C. Loken Come Monday Morning 66: Hell she couldn’t touch Carol with a ten-foot pole.

never touch it (n.) [‘it’ being alcohol]

(Aus.) a teetotaller.

1885		Bulletin (Sydney) 18 July 12/2: ‘That’s all right,’ exclaimed the signature-grabber, ‘but this petition happens to be in favour of keeping open the pubs. on Sundays.’ And as the signer happened to be a Past Master Grand of the Never-Touch-Its, his thoughts as he strode off are totally unfit for publication.
1890		Bulletin (Sydney) 9 Aug. 10/1: As I was about leaving I found I had on hand three-pints of a bottle of whisky, and not wishing to take it into Orange – there I passed as a never-touch-it – I generously decided to make a present of it to two men I had seen knocking about the pub.

touch all bases (v.) [baseball imagery]

(US) to be very thorough, or adaptable and versatile.

1988

P. Griffiths ‘Touching Base With Your Partner’ in Daily Herald 16 July 🌐 You need to touch all bases in marriage for effective communication. It’s easy to skip one or more bases. They may not seem that important.

touch base (v.) [baseball imagery]

to communicate with, to make contact.

1918		F. Palmer America in France 81: He [...] might be dispatched from one desk to another until he had touched base at every desk in Headquarters without ever having a chance to discuss the war situation .
1934		Survey LXX 271/3: Social workers who want, via their own fraternity, to know the latest word on housing matters should touch base with Abraham Goldfeld, AASW.
1949		F.L. Allan Great Pierpont Morgan 218: For after every sally against big business he would go back to touch base with the conservative leadership of the Republican party.
1965		W.C. Anderson Adam M-1 82: As a small oversight, you neglected to touch base with the base Information Office.
1974		Time 17 June 89: [He] quickly outraged White House staffers by choosing his top assistants without touching base with the President.
1997		H.S. Thompson in Proud Highway 545: Thomson touched base with Blackburn.
1999		K. Sampson Powder 221: He wanted to touch base with Snowy and Beano.
2007		Roberts & Krayan Foreclosure Investing for Dummies 97: If it was more than about a year ago, chances are good that you’ll never touch base with that person again.
2020		G. Disher Consolation 8: ‘I touch base with these home-school kids a few times a year’.
2024		D. Swierczynski California Bear 71: ‘I touched base with your sister-in-law yesterday’.

touch ’em up (n.)

the vagina.

1890–1904

Farmer & Henley Sl. and Its Analogues.

touching the dog’s arse (n.) [the initials taking and driving away]

(UK Und.) the act of stealing a car.

1989

J. Morton Lowspeak 141: Touching the dog’s arse – taking and driving away a motor vehicle. South London expression.

touch up

see separate entries.

wouldn’t touch it with a (barge-)pole (also ...poke with a long stick, ...with a ten-foot/forty-foot (barge-)pole, ...with the end of a barge-pole, ...with a clothes-prop, ...a hot poker, ...a walking-stick)

1. an expression of a lack of interest in something; ad hoc vars. on the end of the phr. can occur.

1838		Lexington Observer 2 June n.p.: I can’t touch her with a forty foot pole [DA].
1845		D. Corcoran Pickings from N.O. Picayune (1847) 72: He was so fat that the fever and ague couldn’t touch him with a ten foot pole.
1862		J.R. Lowell Biglow Papers 2nd Ser. (1880) 13: We’ll fix ye so’s ’t a bar’ / Would n’ tch ye with a ten-foot pole.
1873		Newton Kansan 26 June 1/5: Their owner cannot touch them with a forty-foot pole [DA].
1889		C. Deveureux Venus in India I 104: I said not for all the thousand rupees in India, that he was too loathsome a brute for me to touch with the end of a barge pole, much more so than for me to take in my arms.
1900		Bulletin (Sydney) 24 Feb. 8/3: The thin red line is a fine thing in poetry, but in real life when no war is on, the average Englishman wouldn’t touch it with a long pole.
1900		Manchester Courier 8 Jan. 4/2: We strongly advise our readers not to touch British motor shares — even with a barge-pole.
1901		J. Flynt World of Graft 115: I wouldn’t ’a’ touched a bank with a hunderd-foot lightnin’ rod.
1903		J. Furphy Such is Life 22: He used to come sometimes an’ just shake hands with her, but otherways he wouldn’t touch her with a forty-foot pole.
1905		Sporting Times 1 Apr. 3/3: Herded with a lot of bounders you wouldn’t touch with a bargepole.
1907		Western Star (Toowoomba, Qld) 15 May 2/6: Mr. Morgan wouldn’t have anything to do with him. As the saying goes, he wouldn’t touch him with a 40ft. pole.
1909		L.W. Payne Jr ‘Word-List From East Alabama’ in DN III:v 383: touch with a ten foot pole, v. phr. Used in negative expressions to add emphasis. ‘I wouldn’t touch it with a ten-foot pole.’.
1914		Bulletin (Sydney) 13 Aug. 11/3: People who, under normal circumstances, wouldn’t have touched Orangeism with a 40-rod pole were beginning to join absurdly-named Lodges and to clothe themselves in preposterous regalia in the belief that in some vague way they were thereby shoving along the cause of Empire.
1919		J. Buchan Mr Standfast (1930) 736: ‘You cur!’ I cried. ‘She loathes the sight of you. She wouldn’t touch you with the end of a barge-pole.’.
1922		R. McAlmon ‘Abrupt Decision’ A Hasty Bunch 148: I wouldn’t let that fellow touch me with a ten foot pole.
1927		Queensland Times (Brisbane) 19 Jan. 3/1: .
1928		M. Bodenheim Georgie May 21: We wouldn’t be touching this gang with a ten-foot spike.
1934		Wodehouse Right Ho, Jeeves 149: I wouldn’t touch Angela with a barge pole.
1939		L. Short Raiders of the Rimrock 37: You’re the only nester I’d touch with a ten-foot pole.
1940		W.R. Burnett High Sierra in Four Novels (1984) 402: If I was smart I wouldn’t touch this stuff with a fishing-pole.
1944		G. Fowler Good Night, Sweet Prince 398: I told Jack that I would see him in hell before I touched the dramatic whimsey with a ten-foot pole.
1945		G. Fairlie Capt. Bulldog Drummond 77: I wouldn’t touch a hair of her head [...] with an asbestos poker seven yards long.
1946		(con. 1910s) J. Thompson Heed the Thunder (1994) 239: They won’t touch the loan with a ten-foot pole.
1953		J. Thompson Alcoholics (1993) 88: The guys in the racket wouldn’t touch the job with a ten-foot pole.
1956		A. Burgess Time for a Tiger 13: ‘Christ, man, I wouldn’t touch him with a walking-stick. They’re talking, I tell you, about letting the side down.
1962		B. McGhee Cut and Run (1963) 96: I wouldn’t touch her with a ten-foot pole, with crap on the end of it.
1964		‘Charles Barrett’ Address: Kings Cross 86: ‘You know Slim Kim wouldn’t touch you with a barge pole. He likes to be careful’.
1965		E. Bond Saved Scene vii: They shouldn’t let him touch a sick rat with a barge pole.
1973		G.V. Higgins Digger’s Game (1981) 90: I wouldn’t touch the Greek with a pole if I was drowning.
1976		J. Braine Waiting for Sheila (1977) 96: I wouldn’t touch the sod with a bargepole.
1979		E. Torres After Hours 182: I wouldn’t get near him with a ten-foot pole.
1980		J. McClure Spike Island (1981) 78: This? Mine? Wouldn’t touch it with a bloody barge —.
1982		W. Safire What’s The Good Word? 67: A ‘five-year plan’ [...] is an economic system we would not touch with a ten-foot pole.
1999		Observer Screen 25 July 6: Serious actors of the world wouldn’t touch the part with a ten-foot pole.
2000		Indep. Rev. 19 Jan. 1: And, personally, I wouldn’t touch some of these teas with a bargepole.
2002		in ‘Ben Trovato’ On the Run (2007) 17: Living with such a man could be a complete turn-off. I wouldn’t touch him with a 10-foot pole.
2003		McGill Reed Dict. of N.Z. Sl. 234: wouldn’t touch it with a forty foot pole/red-hot poker Extreme distaste. ANZ C20.
2023		(con. 1962) J. Ellroy Enchanters 81: Calvinist Bobby [Kennedy] wouldn’t poke Marilyn [Monroe] with a long stick.

2. a phr. used to express one’s lack of interest in possible sexual partner.

1866		Sydney Mail 22 Dec. 4/1: How dare he to have the impudence to say that she would cuddle him? Bah! she wouldn’t touch him with a clothes prop, said I.
1898		Albury Banner (NSW) 14 Jan. 8/2: ‘She’s very tenderly considerate of his feelings,’ thought Cora, with a curling lip, ‘and she wouldn’t have touched him with a ten-foot pole if he hadn’t struck a bonanza!’ .
1939		K. Tennant Foveaux 57: I wouldn’t pick you up with a clothes-prop. No, not if it had insecticide on the end of it.
1959		F. Norman Fings I i: ’E says ’e wouldn’t touch either of yer wiv a barge pole.
1959		W. Brown Teen-Age Mafia 38: Pico wouldn’t touch her with a ten-foot pole.
1967		P. Thomas Down These Mean Streets (1970) 198: Dammit, I wouldn’t touch that fuckin’ paddy bitch with a ten-foot dick.
1994		I. Welsh ‘A Smart Cunt’ Acid House 253: Ah widnae touch that [i.e. a fat woman] wi a fuckin bargepole.

wouldn’t touch it with a dog’s prick

a general phr. of aversion, esp. in a sexual context.

1968

N. Heard Howard Street 138: I wouldn’t touch you with a dog’s prick, bitch.

wouldn’t touch it with a hop pole

a phr. indicating aversion or uninterest.

1675

Head Miss Display’d 70: She would let neither of them touch her with a Hoppole.

wouldn’t touch it with a pair of tongs

a phr. indicating aversion or uninterest.

1667		R. L’Estrange (trans.) Visions of Quevedo (1708) 18: Your Beauties can never want Gallants to lay their Appetites [...] Whereas No-body will touch the ill-favour’d without a pair of tongs .
1670		J. Ray Proverbs 196: I’de not touch him with a pair of tongs.
1684		J. Lacy Sir Hercules Buffoon II iv: She’s as ugly as she’s old: a man with all his neighing youth about him wou’d not touch her with a Pair of Tongs.
1842		Exquisite 62 16/2: ‘Sir, I would not touch your wife even with a pair of tongs’.
1875		Illus. Sydney News 26 JAn. 11/2: ‘Did you ever! Well I don’t want him - wouldn’t touch him with a pair of tongsbarge’.
1883		‘Eccentricities in Boudoir II 51: For shame, you hussey; why my husband wouldn’t touch you with a pair of tongs.
1888–94		‘Walter’ My Secret Life (1966) VI 1259: I wouldn’t let one of the bouggers touch me with a pair o’ tangs.
1903		Exp. & Teleg. (Adelaide) 19 June 2/2: ‘I wouldn’t touch him with a pair of tongs if I could,’ Burdy rejoined.

wouldn’t touch it with a pitchfork

1. used by one man to another to express his lack of interest in a woman they are observing.

1888–94		‘Walter’ My Secret Life (1966) VI 1244: He said [...] that he wouldn’t touch any woman in that street with a pitchfork.
1932		: .

2. (Aus.) a phr. indicating one’s absolute aversion.

1932

Truth (Sydney) 9 Oct. 4/3: Seeing that he had drawn (he extreme outside of the field and had 6lbs extra to hump as a result of his win at Adelaide, most punters wouldn’t touch him with a pitchfork.

wouldn’t touch it with a (red-hot) poker

(Aus.) a phr. indicating one’s absolute aversion.

1901		Newsletter (Sydney) 27 July 11/2: I wonder if any self-esteeming medical man would touch it with a poker.
1911		Fitzroy City Press (Melbourne) 17 Mar. 2/4: The thing itself - the census paper - is regarded to as something that should only be touched with a hot poker.
1916		Northern Times (Newcastle, NSW) 9 Nov. 2/7: ‘Well let me tell you, once and for all, that I wouldn’t touch it with a poker’ .
1941		Baker Popular Dict. Aus. Sl.
1988		McGill Dict. of Kiwi Sl. 125/2: wouldn’t touch it with a red-hot poker extreme aversion.
2003		McGill Reed Dict. of N.Z. Sl. [as cit. 1988].

wouldn’t touch it with a rotten stick

a phr. indicating one’s absolute aversion.

1865

Leaves from Diary of Celebrated Burglar 131/1: I’m sooir thau nau but foolin th’ tyme awaiy fur ’e wudn’t touch th’ wi’ a rotten stick!

wouldn’t touch it with yours (also ...with mine)

a popular phrase between two men observing a woman when the speaker finds her unattractive – yours is the penis; thus a phr. expressing distaste of anything.

1966		(con. 1948–52) L. Thomas Virgin Soldiers 39: There’s some I wouldn’t touch even with mine.
1984		Partridge DSUE (8th edn) 1353/2.

In exclamations

touch bone and whistle! [SE bone, i.e. a tooth + whistle]

an excl. used as a reproval/warning to anyone who has broken wind; they are then liable to be pinched by anyone present until they have ‘touched bone’ (their teeth) and whistled.

c.1786		Grose Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue ms. additions n.p.: Touch Bone & Whistle, any one having broken Wind Backwards, according to the Vulgar Law, may be Pinched by any of the Company till he has touched his Teeth and Whistled.
1788, 1796		Grose Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue (2nd, 3rd edn).
1811		Lex. Balatronicum [as cit. 1788].
1823		Egan Grose’s Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue.

touch v.1

In phrases

SE in slang uses

In compounds

In phrases

In exclamations

touch v.¹