Mrs, n. — Green’s Dictionary of Slang

Mrs n.

1. a wife, esp. as the Mrs. The husband’s surname is omitted, e.g. Here is Mr Smith, Mrs is out shopping; also in homosexual relationships.

1642		Three-fold Discourse Between Three Neighbours 5: You are deceived Mrs. we never go for the signs sake, but for the wines sake.
1661		A. Brome ‘To a Gentleman that fell sick of the small Pox’ Songs and Poems 207: Then blush no more, but let your Mrs. know.
1662		‘M.W.’ Marriage Broaker V i: Go and prepare Thy Mrs. too.
1917		Goodwin’s Wkly (Salt Lake City) 21 July 3/1: So to keep the peace, the husband concluded, — [...] That he would pamper his Mrs.
1920		R. Lardner Big Town 8: Then Kate and the Mrs. had one together.
1933		N. West ‘Miss Lonelyhearts’ Coll. Works (1975) 233: The Mrs will be out in a few minutes. She’s in the tub.
1943		‘Henry Green’ Caught (2001) 36: I said to the Mrs, I says, ‘Well, mother, your old man’s in trouble again.’.
1953		A.J. Liebling Honest Rainmaker (1991) 41: Dr. Sykes and his Mrs. were directing workmen.
1972		B. Rodgers Queens’ Vernacular 138: Mrs title for a gayly married effeminate.
1980		T. Lewis GBH 117: ‘The local lads are very interested in Ray Warren’s disappearance [...] And his Mrs’.

2. a bawd, a brothel-keeper.

1668

‘P.R.’ Whores Dialogue 1: My Mrs, who had as fine a Trade as any one of her calling [...], this plaguy rout hath quite undone her [Ibid] 5: I see if thy Mrs. should turn thee away thou are able to set up Bawd for thyself.

3. see Miss n.

Used with proper or metonymic names

In compounds

Mrs Astor (n.)

see Miss Astor under Miss n.

Mrs Astorbilt (n.)

see Astorbilt n.

Mrs Astor’s pet horse (n.) (also Mrs Astor’s plush horse) [var. on Astor’s pet horse n.] (US)

1. an over-made-up or overdressed person.

[1917		R. Lardner Gullible’s Travels 81: About once a week we’d beat it to one o’ the good hotels down-town, all dressed up like a horse, and have our dinner with the rest o’ the E-light].
1922		Motor Boat 19 33: FAMILIAR figures No. 2 (seen from balcony), Billy Gibb dolled up like Mrs. Astor’s pet horse, decorating the for’ard cockpit of the Sea Sled Marathon.
1929		G.P. Bent Four Score & More 281/1: All dressed up like Mrs. Astor’s plush horse, wearing sombreros, rebosos, serapes, etc.
1935		S. Walker Mrs. Astor’s Horse 8: [One says] of any one who was rather ostentatiously dolled up: ‘she is dressed up like Mrs. Astor’s plush horse.’ Sometimes the phrase was ‘Mrs. Astor’s pet horse.’.
1942		Pittsburgh Courier (PA) 22 Aug. 21/2: W.C. Handy [and] Billy Banks [...] are the sensaytions [sic] of Billy Rose’s Diamond Horseshoe, ‘Mrs Astor’s Pet horse,’ review.
1960		San Antonio Express 28 Sept. n.p.: 🌐 she drives a new car and dresses like Mrs Astor’s plush horse .
1996		A.G. Marsala Miss. Ring Apr. 🌐 Mother helped me dress, did my hair, and fussed over me as if I were Mrs. Astor’s pet horse.
2002		tootalltodd.blogspot.com 10 Jan. [blog] ‘I didn’t want to come in looking like Mrs. Astor’s pet horse.’ Sylvia Myer, fielding a compliment about her well-coifed appearance earlier this week.
2004		posting at www.gopusa.com 2 May 🌐 They’ll dress up like Mrs. Astor’s plush horse for weddings, when they’re putting on a show, but for any other sacred event, it’s jeans, sweatshirts, tee-shirts, shorts, etc.

2. (US) as sense 1, of an over-ornamented inanimate object.

1951

Detroit Free Press (MI) 15 Mar. 40/3: [advert] 1949 fords — I’ve got three of these all duked up like Mrs Astor’s pet horse; dripping chrome and sunshades and they run like scared rabbits choice of color at $1,287.

Mrs Charlie (n.)

(US black) a white woman in a position of authority, the fem. of Mr Charlie n. (1)

1959

A. Anderson ‘Suzie Q.’ in Lover Man 66: When I lost my hustle she took to bringing me little snips and snaps from Mrs Charlie’s kitchen, you dig?

Mrs Evans (n.) [a witch of that name, who was supposedly wont to turn herself into a cat]

a female cat.

1785, 1788, 1796

Grose Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue n.p.: Mrs. Evans, a name frequently given to a she cat, owing, it is said, to a witch of the name of Evans, who frequently assumed the appearance of a cat.

Mrs Fubbs (n.) [a witch of that name, who was supposedly wont to turn herself into a cat]

a female cat.

1785, 1788, 1796

Grose Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue n.p.: Mrs. Evans, a name frequently given to a she cat, owing, it is said, to a witch of the name of Evans, who frequently assumed the appearance of a cat.

Mrs Fubbs’ parlour (n.)

the vagina.

1823

‘Jon Bee’ Dict. of the Turf, the Ring, the Chase, etc. 84: Mrs. Fubbs front parlour [...] is not to be mistaken for any part of any building.

Mrs Goff (n.) [ety. unknown; ? anecdotal]

(US campus) a woman.

1844		A. Peirce Rebelliad 21: But cease the touching chords to sweep, / For Mrs. Goff has deigned to weep.
1856		B.H. Hall College Words (rev. edn) 328: mrs. goff. Formerly a cant phrase for any woman.

Mrs Greenfields (n.) [imaginary landladies]

(UK tramp) sleeping in the open air; thus Mrs Ashpits, sleeping near a lime-kiln.

1941

V. Davis Phenomena in Crime 255: Living with Mrs. Greenfield. Sleeping in the park.

Mrs Hand (and her five daughters) (n.)

the hand, as used for masturbation; thus make a rendezvous with Mrs Hand, to masturbate.

1988		B. Humphries Complete Barry McKenzie 12: I take them old wives’ tales about Mrs. Hand and her five daughters with a pinch of salt.
2002		Turnandburn 🌐 Masturbation — Male [...] have a big date with Rosy Palms, have a small stroke, have a rendezvous with Mrs. Hand.
2006		R. Hughes Things I Didn’t Know (2007) 130: The somewhat monotonous but reliable company of Mrs. Hand and her five ever-willing daughters.

Mrs Harris and Mrs Gamp (n.) [from the two characters, the latter ‘real’ and former her imaginary friend, in Charles Dickens’s Martin Chuzzlewit (1843–4)]

the Morning Herald and the Standard newspapers.

1846		Punch x 11: It is a fact – and we will stake our reputation upon it – that Mrs. Gamp of the Herald did, one day last week, write [...] a leader about Lord John Russell [F&H].
1860		Hotten Dict. of Modern Sl. etc. (2nd edn) 176: Mrs. Harris and Mrs. Gamp nicknames of the Morning Herald and Standard newspapers, while united under the proprietorship of Mr. Baldwin. mrs. gamp, a monthly nurse, was a character in Mr. Charles Dickens’ popular novel of Martin Chuzzlewit, who continually quoted an imaginary Mrs Harris in attestation of the superiority of her qualifications, and the infallibility of her opinions; and thus afforded a parallel to the two newspapers, who appealed to each other as independent authorities, being all the while the production of the same editorial staff.
1864, 1867, 1870		Hotten Sl. Dict.
1870		Sportsman (London) 5 Jan. 2/1: The Standard is furious [...] and it would seem [...] that a little of the ‘Gamp’ bile has become infused into the system of the lamented matron’s legitimate successor.
1873		Sl. Dict.
[1885		Punch 8 Aug. n.p.: The Standard figures as ‘Sairey Gamp’ scolding – in allusion to a recent article in the S. abusing Lord Randolph Churchill [F&H]].

Mrs Jones (n.) (also Mistress Jones, Mrs Jones’s counting house, Mrs Jones’s house)

the lavatory; thus visit Mrs Jones, to use the lavatory; upset Mrs Jones, to tip over the water closet.

1823		‘Jon Bee’ Dict. of the Turf, the Ring, the Chase, etc. 210: Mistress Jones — house-keeper of the water-closet.
1835		G. Kent Modern Flash Dict. 10: Counting-house, Mrs. Jones’s, the privy.
1846		Swell’s Night Guide 123/1: Jones’s, Mrs, the coffee-house privy.
1864, 1867, 1870		Hotten Sl. Dict.
1890–1904		Farmer & Henley Sl. and Its Analogues.

Mrs Kafoops (n.)

see Mrs Kafoops under kafoops n.

Mrs Laycock (n.)

see Miss Laycock under Miss n.

Mrs Lukey Props (n.) [? anecdotal]

a brothel-keeper.

1890–1904

Farmer & Henley Sl. and Its Analogues.

Mrs Mopp (n.) [the character Mrs Mopp created by Tommy Handley (1892–1949) for the radio comedy series ITMA (It’s That Man Again), from 1939. Her catchphrase was ‘Can I do you now, sir?’]

1. a cleaner.

[1941		ITMA (BBC Light Programme) 10 Oct. [radio script] Mrs. Mopp (Dorothy Summers): Can I do for you now, sir?].
1945		M.J. Blunt 25 May diary in Garfield Our Hidden Lives (2004) 32: Certain things had been put back on their shelves and ledges with the symmetry so beloved of Mrs. Mops.
1959		Dly Mirror 2 June 7/3: The ‘Mrs Mopps’ [...] who were ‘skivvies’ to officers’ wives [...] have laid down their brooms for ever.
1983		J. Sullivan ‘Yesterday Never Comes’ Only Fools and Horses [TV script] Oh I see, and this Mrs Mopp examined it did she?
2003		Bolton Business Finder 🌐 Mrs Mopp Cleaning Services 12 Chestnut Avenue Tottington.

2. a shop [rhy. sl.].

1992

R. Puxley Cockney Rabbit.

Mrs Palm and her five daughters (n.) (also Madam Palm and her five sisters, Mrs Palmer (and her five daughters))

the hand, as used for masturbation .

1963–74		B. Humphries Barry McKenzie [comic strip] in Complete Barry McKenzie (1988) 71: Old Mrs. Palm and her five daughters have been working overtime lately.
1986		in Tracks (Aus.) Feb. 16: I live with my true love, Dryanna Palmer (no relation to that famous lady of five daughters – Mrs. Palmer – to whom I used to resort before I met Dryanna.
1986		C. Bowles G’DAY 87: If she’s not keen, it may be necessary for Mrs Palm and her five daughters to take matters in hand.
1993		B. Moore Lex. of Cadet Lang. 238: Mrs Palmer and her five daughters the palm of one’s hand and the five fingers thereof: essential for masturbation: hence (a euphemism for) masturbation.
2000		Sex-Lexis 🌐 visit Mrs. Palm and her 5 daughters; visit Rosy Palm and her five daughters.
2001		D. Looser Boobslang [U. Canterbury D.Phil. thesis] 120/1: Mrs Palmer n. an act of masturbation, performed alone: ‘What do you do for sex in here, x?’ ‘I just go and see Mrs Palmerand her five daughters’.
1997		Roger’s Profanisaurus in Viz 87 Dec. n.p.: Madam Palm and her five sisters euph. Wanking. As in: ‘I’m just off to bed with Madam Palm and her five sisters’.
2013		email to Guardian 7 Feb. 🌐 Just some snotty nosed little toss rats, whose closest relationship to a women is Mrs Palm and her 5 daughters.

Mrs Philip’s ware (n.) (also Mrs Phillips) [‘These machines were long prepared and sold by a matron of the name of Phillips, at the Green Canister, in Half-moon Street, in the Strand. That good lady, having acquired a fortune, retired from business, but learning that the town was not well served by her successors, she, out of a patriotic zeal for the public welfare, returned to her occupation; out of which she gave notice by divers hand-bills, in circulation in the year 1776’ (Grose, 1796). Whether she was related to Mrs Phillips, that brothel-keeper who, in the mid-19C, ran a house at 11 Upper Belgrave Place, is alas unknown; see Williams (1994) II 1016 for a substantial discussion]

a condom.

1785		Grose Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue n.p.: to fight in armour, to make use of Mrs. Philip’s ware. See c—d—m. [Ibid.] Machines, Mrs. Philip’s ware.
1786		J. Gillray A Sale of Eng. Beauties, in the East Indies 16 May [cartoon] Mrs Phillips (the original inventor).
1798		‘Runnymede Pillar’ in Hilaria 32: That architect, old Mother Phillips I mean / Doth cases prepare of a curious structure.

Mrs Princum Prancum (n.)

see Mistress Princum Prancum n.

Mts Quickly (n.)

(N.Z. prison) uncut amphetamine.

2001

D. Looser Boobslang [U. Canterbury D.Phil. thesis] 120/1: Mrs Quickly n. speed in an ‘uncut’ (i.e. pure) state.

Mrs Suds (n.)

a washerwoman.

1757

Foote Author in Works (1799) I 133: Mrs. Suds, your washerwoman, makes the three half crowns.

Mrs Van Astorbilt (n.)

see Astorbilt n.

Mrs Van Neck (n.)

see Miss van Neck under Miss n.

Mrs White (n.) [white n. (3)]

a drug dealer, presumably in white powders, i.e. narcotics.

1928		M.C. Sharpe Chicago May (1929) 260: Mrs. White — the name used to and for dope-peddlers.
1953		Anslinger & Tompkins Traffic In Narcotics 312: Mrs. White. A drug peddler.