Green’s Dictionary of Slang

kiss v.

1. in sexual contexts.

(a) to have sexual intercourse [note Fr. baiser, lit. to kiss, in sl. to have sexual intercourse].

[UK]Mayd Emlyn in Rimbault Poetical Tracts 15: Full swetely wolde she kys With galauntes, ywys, And say it was no synne.
[UK]Harman Caveat for Common Cursetours in Viles & Furnivall (1907) 61: He offers the same closely to this mannerly Marian [...] if she would meet him on the back-side of the town and courteously kiss him without constraint.
[UK]Parliament of Women B4: Mistris Dorcas Doe-little [...] saith she, my husband is a Gamester and as he games abroad, so I play at home; if he bee at bowles and kisse the Mistris, I can for recreation play at rubbers with his man.
[UK] ‘Merry Cuckold’ in Chappell Roxburghe Ballads (1871) I 256: Wiues chast appeare, yet they’l kisse now and then.
[UK] ‘Penance’ in Ebsworth Merry Drollery Compleat (1875) I 167: If every Wench were served so Then kissing would be dear.
Behn Dutch Lover III ii: Give me a Wench that will out-drink the Dutch, out-dance the French, and out-out-kiss the English.
[UK] ‘English Fortune-Teller’ in R. Thompson Pepys’ Penny Merriments (1976) 70: [A thumb-line] long and reddish, in the hand of a Woman, intimates she will kiss in a corner, or (in a plainer sence) is a little whorish.
[UK]N. Ward London-Spy xiv 343: She’ll prove an excellent Bedfellow to him that has the Luck to Marry her, and a kind Companion to an Honest Friend that loves Kissing in a Corner.
N. Ward Step to Stir-Bitch Fair in Writings II 253: If the Mistress thou can’st Bed, Be sure thou do’st not Kiss the Maid.
[UK]A. Ramsay Fables and Tales in Poems II (1800) 515: Ah me! you reverence’s sister, Ten times I carnally have – kist her.
[UK]C. Morris ‘The Great Plenipotentiary’ Collection of Songs (1788) 44: The next to be kissed on the Plenipo’s list was a delicate Maid of Honour.
[UK]Banquet of Wit 18: Down he lays and up mounts madam. When they had run their lengths, she demanded her goose. No, says Hodge, it is not your’s yet, by G—d, madam for you have kissed me.
[UK] ‘The Blowen’s Man’ Frisky Vocalist 21: I had a gal the other night, / They call her randy Anna – / I kiss’d her full two dozen times / And she never charged a tanner.

(b) (also kiss it) to fellate or perform cunnilingus.

[[UK]‘Bashe Libel’ in May & Bryson Verse Libel 81: And may not such a man as this, / Think himself worthy for to kisse / A chauncler’s daughter wher she doth pisse? / [...] / With lips, with nose, with toung and all].
[US]G. Legman ‘Lang. of Homosexuality’ Appendix VII in Henry Sex Variants.
[US]Guild Dict. Homosexual Terms 26: kiss (or kiss it) (v.): Universally meaning to fellate or cunnilingue; it is usually, if not always, said in a lingering way with accents or gestures to distinguish it from the ordinary kiss.
[US]B. Rodgers Queens’ Vernacular 33: to suck a penis [...] kiss it (’40s–late ’50s). [Ibid.] 121: kiss 1. to practice oral copulation with either sex: kiss it down = sucking cunt, while kiss it off = suck cock.

2. (US) to hit or strike hard.

‘My Roomy’ R. Lardner Round Up (1929) 339: He kisses the first thing they hands him for three bases .
[US]D. Runyon ‘Earthquake’ Runyon on Broadway (1954) 161: Earthquake picks up one of [...] Charley Bernstein’s tables and kisses Johnny Brannigan with same.

3. (US teen) to reject, to do without etc. [abbr. kiss off v./SE kiss goodbye].

[US]G. Sculatti Catalog of Cool [Internet] (to) kiss (verb): To skip, pass, shine on. ‘She told me she’d rather just go to the mountains and kiss the city altogether this weekend.’.
Tucows Tukids [Internet] Hi Tech Calc! Set 0.9 This program comes with a desktop makeover so you can kiss that plain-looking old one of yours away.

4. to approach, to draw near, e.g. of a birthday or date.

[UK]Guardian Weekend 19 June 22: A bunch of men kissing 50.

In phrases

kiss one’s ass goodbye (v.) (also kiss one’s asshole goodbye) [arse n. (1)/ass n. (2)/asshole n. (1)]

to give up completely, to abandon all hope.

[US]L. Heinemann Close Quarters (1987) 253: You could hear the loud sloppy smacking of lips as everybody bent over to kiss their assholes goodbye.
[US](con. 1970) S. Wright Meditations in Green (1985) 197: ‘Sorry. I only wanted to see what time it is.’ ‘Time? Time to kiss your ass goodbye.’.
[US]S. King It (1987) 387: It shows where the emergency exits are [...] how to assume the crash-landing position. ‘The Kiss-your-ass-goodbye folder,’ he says.
[US](con. 1967) Bunch & Cole Reckoning for Kings (1989) 6: Leave this crap for the kids. Or kiss your sweet Irish ass good-bye.
[US]F. Kellerman Stalker (2001) 206: The patter, the speech, the spiel, the pitch. You don’t have that, you can kiss your business ass good-bye.
[US]C. Carr Our Town 94: ‘Anybody kills a Klansman,’ he spit, ‘they better bend over, kiss their ass good-bye, because the Klan comes in this town, this town is gonna be fuckin’ leveled.’.
kiss oneself goodbye (v.)

1. (US) to give up hope, to surrender.

[US]Van Loan ‘The Bush League Demon’ Big League (2004) 47: You’ve been gettin’ way with a lot of stuff to-day [...] but here’s where you can kiss yourself good-by! [sic].

2. to commit suicide.

[US]William Gibson ‘The Winter Market’ [Internet] She’d gone out that night, I knew, to kiss herself goodbye. To find someone drunk enough to do it for her.
kiss someone’s arse/ass (v.)

see separate entry .

kiss someone’s ring (v.) (also kiss someone’s toe) [SE kiss the ring, to pay homage, but note ring n. (1b) thus var. on kiss someone’s arse v.]

to fawn, to act the sycophant, to toady.

[[UK]M. Edgeworth Love and Law IIi i: I must warn and apprize you – that I am most remarkably clear-sighted; consequently there can be no thumb kissing with me, gentlemen].
[Aus]Bulletin (Sydney) 5 Nov. 29/2: They want a thing who’ll cadge them jobs, / From Beersheba to Dan; / They want a fraud who’ll creep for votes / And kiss the voter’s toe, / Who’ll meekly slobber every friend, / And fawn on every foe.
[UK]G. Melly Owning Up (1974) 224: The producers [were] fed up with bandleaders on the make who were willing if necessary to kiss their rings.
[US]C. Heath A-Team 2 (1984) 141: I’m not in your club, remember? I don’t have to kiss your ring.
[US]N. George ‘Michael Bivins’ Buppies, B-Boys, Baps and Bohos (1994) 64: This was seen as a joke by a lot of folks now kissing their ring.
kiss the babe (v.) (also kiss the baby)

(orig. US) to take a drink.

[US] in Aswell Humor 341: ‘Kiss baby, gents,’ said the man from Buffalo Wallow....Then all was silence except for a brief community gurgling [HDAS].
[US]C. Neider Authentic Death of Hendry Jones 89: He lifted a whisky bottle to his mouth, drank, said ‘Kiss me baby’ and passed he bottle around.
kiss the baby (v.) [the imminent kissing goodbye of one’s child]

(US Und.) to face a certain term of imprisonment.

[US]Bentley & Corbett Prison Sl. 28: Kiss the Baby A guaranteed prison sentence. ‘He robbed the bank, now he can kiss the baby.’.
kiss the Clink (v.) (also kiss the Counter, Kiss Newgate) [clink n.1 (1)/SE counter/Newgate, a prison attached to a city court]

to be confined in either of these prisons.

[UK]John Udall State of the Church of England, etc. (Arber) 22: If I catche thee in London, I will make thee kiss the clinke for this geare [F&H].
[UK]Rowlands Night Raven 11: You kisse the Counter sirra that is flat, Ile teach you know my place deserues a hat.
[UK]Harper in Bentley’s Misc. (1837) Feb. 180: They will follow you close, and never leave you till you draw your purse, or they for you, though they kisse Newgate for it.
kiss the dog (v.)

(US Und.) of a pickpocket, to steal from a person while face-to-face.

[US]Ersine Und. and Prison Sl.
[US]Monteleone Criminal Sl. (rev. edn).
[US]Goldin et al. DAUL 117/2: Kiss the dog. (Pickpocket jargon) To face a victim while in the act of picking his pocket.
kiss the dust (v.) [orig. mid-18C boxing kiss the dust, to be knocked down]

(orig. US) to die.

[US]Wood & Goddard Dict. Amer. Sl. 28: kiss the dust. Be overthrown.
[US]L. Pound ‘American Euphemisms for Dying’ in AS XI:3 198: Kissed the dust.
kiss the maid (v.) [SE maiden, a form of early guillotine used at Edinburgh in late 16C; occas. applied to the Halifax gibbet]

to be executed on a primitive form of the guillotine.

[UK]B.E. Dict. Canting Crew n.p.: Kissing the Maid, an Engine in Scotland, and at Halifax in England.
[UK]New Canting Dict. [as cit. c.1698].
kiss the parson’s wife (v.) [the belief that those who wish for such luck must ‘kiss the parson’s wife’]

to be lucky in the choosing of or betting on horses.

[UK]Grose Classical Dict. of the Vulgar Tongue (3rd edn) n.p.: He that would have luck in horse-flesh, must kiss a parson’s wife.
[UK]Lex. Balatronicum [as cit. 1796].
kiss the worm (v.) [worm n.]

to fellate.

[US]G. Legman ‘Lang. of Homosexuality’ Appendix VII in Henry Sex Variants.
[US]Guild Dict. Homosexual Terms 26: kiss the worm (v.): The children’s term to practice fellation in games involving the penis (worm), wherein a boy’s penis is urinated on, or spit on, daubed with paint, etc.; or even the ‘kissing’ of the penis which is the forfeit a boy must pay for losing in a game.

In exclamations

kiss it where the sun don’t shine! (also kiss me where the sun don’t shine! kiss a fat lady in the ass!)

(orig. US) a general excl. of derision or dismissal.

[US]LaBarge & Holt Sweetwater Gunslinger 201 (1990) 53: Well, kiss a fat lady in the ass! [...] The damn probe isn’t coming out.
[US]Cool C ‘Juice Crew Dis’ [lyrics] Kiss me where the sun don’t shine.
[US]R.C. Cruz Straight Outta Compton 48: You can kiss me where the sun don’t shine — and where it rains every day — as far as I’m concerned.
R. Malone Violet of a Deeper Blue 43: Big Red can kiss it where the sun don’t shine, as hard as I been working today.
J. Billups ’Skegee Bound 48: ‘Kiss it where the sun don’t shine. Jim!’ Our argument could be heard over the clamor of the dishwasher.
kiss me neck!

(W.I. Rasta) a common excl. of surprise.

[WI](con. 1940s) L. Bennett ‘Candy Seller’ in Jamaica Labrish 28: Kiss me neck! One no mo’ farden bump she buy.
kiss my arse/ass!

see separate entry.

kiss my foot!

(US/Aus.) a general statement of contempt or dismissal; thus phr. not so much as a kiss-me-foot, without even the most minimal attention or interest.

[US]A.B. Longstreet Georgia Scenes (1848) 204: ‘Kiss my foot!’ said Mealy.
[Aus]R. Park Poor Man’s Orange 32: We gotta come to public hospitals because we’re poor, and so we can be pushed around without so much as a kiss-me-foot.
[Aus]D. Niland Shiralee 87: Not so much as a kiss-me-foot.
[US]C. Himes Cotton Comes to Harlem (1967) 18: Well, kiss my foot if it isn’t Jones.
[Aus]D. Ireland Burn 123: The words would have to go somewhere near: uncut ribbons frayed at the ends; not a kiss-me-foot.
kiss my tail! [tail n. (1); var. on kiss my arse!]

a general statement of contempt or dismissal.

[UK]‘Mr. S’ Gammer Gurton’s Needle in Whitworth (1997) III iii: Thou wert as good kiss my tail!
[UK]J. Phillips Maronides (1678) V 116: They sack and pillage Neptunes Altars / [...] / Fate kiss their tails.
kiss my tuna! [tuna n.; var. on kiss my arse!; the implication is that the oral sex that is invited is de facto distasteful]

(US teen) an all-purpose excl. of rejection.

‘Valley Girls’ on Paranoiafanzine [Internet]’re like, a total jel. I mean, you’re hopeless. So, uh, kiss my tuna, okay.

SE in slang uses

In compounds

kissing trap (n.) [trap n.1 (5)]

(orig. boxing ) the mouth.

[UK]Morn. Chron. 16 June 4/5: The latter had the bark taken from his kissing-trap and the claret exhibited Jem’s happy knack of ‘drawing a cork’.
[Aus]Bell’s Life in Sydney 4 Oct. 1/3: Hayes fought quickly [...] twice or thrice taking liberties with his kissing trap.
[UK]‘Cuthbert Bede’ Adventures of Mr Verdant Green (1982) I 118: He told Verdant, that his claret had been repeatedly tapped, [...] his kissing-trap countered, his ribs roasted, his nut spanked, and his whole person put in chancery, stung, bruised, fibbed, propped, fiddled, slogged, and otherwise ill-treated.
[UK](con. 1845) Fights for the Championship 189: Bendy again nailed Caunt [...] on his damaged kissing-trap.
[Aus]Argys (Melbourne) 30 Nov. 5/5: The report [...] is copiously garnished with the slang of the prize ring; the various features of the brutal combatants being designated ‘ogles,’ ‘probosces,’ ‘smellers,’ ‘kissing traps,’ ‘winkers,’ &c.
[UK]Cheshire Obs. 18 Aug. 8/3: Panfish smacking Grasshopper’s kissing trap, which nearly made Grassey go to grass.
[UK] in G.D. Atkin House Scraps (1887) 54: The ‘offside’ of his ‘kissing-trap’ / Displays an ugly mark!
[UK](ref. to mid-19C) Essex Newsman 10 Sept. 1/3: I was [...] amused by the quaint language used by my predecessors in the Ring [...] ‘The Nobbler dashed in his left mawley and landed on the British Oak’s kissing-trap [...] knocking out two of his front rails’.

In phrases

kiss goodbye (v.)

to reject, to do without, ‘say goodbye’ to.

[US] in National Police Gazette 5 May 3: ‘I’ll kiss mine goodbye,’ said Nell as she dropped her pasteboards in the discard [HDAS].
[US]M. Glass Abe and Mawruss 174: When a feller puts three thousand dollars into a fiddle, y’understand, he could kiss himself good-bye with his business.
[US]T. Thursday ‘Ten Dollars – No Sense’ Top-Notch 15 Dec. [Internet] ‘Kiss that ten good-by!’ I said.
[US](con. 1910s) J.T. Farrell Young Lonigan in Studs Lonigan (1936) 1: Well I’m kissin’ the old dump goodbye.
[US]A.I. Bezzerides Thieves’ Market 197: Kiss the two hundred bucks we’re out on Tex goodbye.
[US]R. Marsten ‘Carrera’s Women’ in Margulies Back Alley Jungle (1963) 67: I’d sweated in the Tampico oilfields [...] socking it away a little at a time, letting it pile up for the day I could kiss Mexico goodbye.
[US]C. Himes Big Gold Dream 139: I figgered she was giving him the money to keep, so I kissed it goodby.
[US]G.V. Higgins Friends of Eddie Coyle (1973) 116: Kiss the car goodbye.
[UK]A. Payne ‘Minder on the Orient Express’ Minder [TV script] 6: Kiss goodbye to kitchen misery, Bozz.
[UK]P. Baker Blood Posse 233: Any answer other than the one I want, then kiss the world goodbye.
[US]J. Lerner You Got Nothing Coming 21: The tie and the wallet you can probably kiss good-bye.
kiss teeth (v.) (also kiss teet, suck teeth)

(orig. W.I. Rasta) to make a hissing noise of disapproval, dislike, vexation or disappointment; also as n.

[US]A. Gonzales Black Border 329: Suck me teet’, a contemptuous, gesture, frequently indulged in by the fair sex.
[WI]‘Uncle Newton’ Ups and Downs of Newsy Wapps Bk 3 14: The Lopez group exchanged many cuteyes and suck-teeths with the Stephensons.
[UK]T. White Catch a Fire 195: But Roslyn rudely kissed her teeth and broke the thoughtful stillness with a scoff.
[UK]C. Newland Scholar 1: His cousin kissed his teeth.
[UK](con. 1979–80) A. Wheatle Brixton Rock (2004) 84: Finnley kissed his teeth and continued to build his spliff.
[UK]L. Kwesi Johnson ‘Liesense fi Kill’ Mi Revalueshanary Fren 98: Kristeen kiss her teet / an shi cut me wid her yeye.
[UK]D.S. Mitchell Killer Tune (2008) 58: She kissed her teeth at him. Stared Bernie down.
[UK]Skepta ‘Text Me Back’ [lyrics] Man, I hate this phone / Kiss my teeth when I hear the ringtone.

In exclamations

kiss kiss! [the kisses offered on saying goodbye]

(US campus) goodbye.

[US]Eble Campus Sl. Fall.
[US]Eble Sl. and Sociability 101: You’re so tan I hate you, bye pokes fun at sorority stereotypes and kiss, kiss at the superficial social custom of kissing good-bye.