Green’s Dictionary of Slang

cream v.

[cream n.1 ]

1. lit. or fig. refs. to ejaculation.

(a) of a man, to ejaculate.

[US] in E. Cray Erotic Muse (1992) 280: She dared him to take it as she lay stripped naked / And he did as everyone knows. / Oh, she laid a-dreaming while he laid a-creaming; / ’Twas down where the black hairs grow. / His cock was stiffer than julep when he saw her tulip / For it looked like a big red rose.
[US] in G. Legman Limerick (1953) 71: As he creamed my wife’s cunt, the coon said, / ‘I could fuck this until she was dead!’ / As he plugged up her trough, / I jerked myself off; / ‘If that’s how you feel, go ahead!’.
[US]W. Burroughs Naked Lunch (1968) 147: Another horrible character just sits there and [...] creams in his dry goods.
[Aus]B. Humphries Barry McKenzie [comic strip] in Complete Barry McKenzie (1988) 94: Kev’s creaming his cassock for Faye already.
[US]L. Kramer Faggots 87: [He] watched him pick up a creamed-upon square and eat it.
[Aus]B. Humphries Traveller’s Tool 114: I know that fantastic old Polish tarmac-basher is creaming his cassock for a nice long chin-wag with Yours Truly.
[UK]M. Simpson ‘Prufrock Scoused’ Catching Up with Hist. 23: Gods onest trute, I woz creemin meself.
[US] in W. Shaw Westsiders 382: Cooch screamin’ / Meat cleanin’ / Creamin’ / Tag teamin’.
[Scot](con. 1980s) I. Welsh Skagboys 68: A sliver of white panties, so electric against those Majorca-tanned thighs that I almost cream on the spot.
[US](con. 1962) J. Ellroy Enchanters 48: I creamed to get back inside Fifth Helena.

(b) (US) to vomit.

[US](con. 1948) G. Mandel Flee the Angry Strangers 45: He creamed all over the floor when you pushed him [...] That’s a sick guy.
[US]Kerouac letter 2 Nov. in Charters II (1999) 223: We tried to play your record from Fantasy but somebody creamed on it [...] The record is covered with some kind of gook.

(c) of a woman, for the vagina to become wet.

[US] in G. Legman Limerick (1953) 183: Her drawers cream at the mere thought of it.
[US]R. Gover One Hundred Dollar Misunderstanding 87: Her lil ol pussy jes a-creamin fer her beer boyfrien’.
[US]N. Eastwood Gardener Got Her n.p.: Every time he slammed his cock into her, she jerked her body upward to take his cock as deep as she could get it. She couldn’t stop her hot horny creaming.
[Aus](con. 1964-65) B. Thorpe Sex and Thugs and Rock ’n’ Roll 202: ‘Yer look fookin’ gear [...] Ta fookin sheilas will cream’.
[UK]A. Close Official and Doubtful 308: It was pitiful to see her creaming herself over him.
M.E. Dassad ‘Chickenhawk’ at www.cultdeadcow.com 🌐 It was always this way with the slutty little brats I picked up, they swore they hated it, at the same time they were creaming all over themselves, as they remembered being nailed.
Cardi B ‘WAP’ 🎵 Make it cream, make me scream.

(d) in fig. use, i.e to find something extremely exciting; to be very desirous of doing something.

[US](con. 1930s–50s) D. Wells Night People 117: Cream. To smile or be happy.
[UK]C. Gaines Stay Hungry 145: I just shot it up and sat there laughing at this spade I was with while I had this monster flash, like creamin off in my head.
[US]C. Hiaasen Double Whammy (1990) 213: Gault must have creamed when his sister suggested you for the mark.
[UK]K. Sampson Powder 59: It was going to be a long wait, listening to them lot creaming it over the fucking mix.

2. in fig. use, the perceived superiority of cream to milk.

(a) (orig. US) to kill, to destroy, to beat up comprehensively, to overcome easily.

[US]Phila. Inquirer 16 June n.p.: An essential part of the ‘toughie’s’ vocabulary is the verb ‘to cream.’ This verb has synonyms which make its meaning plain: To ‘knock cold,’ to ‘cool,’ to ‘beat up on’ and to ‘take.’ It may be used in connection with anything which the speaker dislikes and is often applied to certain examinations. A thing or a person which has been ‘creamed’ has been successfully treated in a violent manner.
[US]R.L. Bellem ‘Death’s Passport’ in Goodstone Pulps (1970) 116/2: Sooner than give him up to another woman, you creamed him.
[US](con. 1950) E. Frankel Band of Brothers 15: Yours [i.e. an assailant] nearly creamed you. [Ibid.] 17: Got shook from creamin’ the gook.
[UK]B. Beckham My Main Mother 99: I’m gonna really do a job on you, Mitchell, I’m gonna cream you.
[US]Ben Greer Slammer (1977) 202: ‘Cream their ass!’ he yelled to the team.
[US]S. King It (1987) 231: Eddie forgot the rules, so they creamed him.
[Aus]C. Bowles G’DAY 51: LES: Strewth, that the score? DAVO: Yeah, we’re gettin creamed.
[Aus]P. Temple Bad Debts (2012) [ebook] If you can work out how a bloke that’s so legless he’s passed out [...] can get sober enough to [...] drive about thirty blocks to cream some bitch.
[Aus]R.G. Barrett Mystery Bay Blues 57: Four fishermen picked a fight with some bloke and he absolutely creamed them.
[US]J. Stahl I, Fatty 143: Jack Dempsey creamed Jess Willard.
[US]T. Pluck Bad Boy Boogie [ebook] [T]he team got creamed in his absence.

(b) (also cream up) to win a sporting competition, to pass an examination easily or decisively, thus do anything well.

Dict. of Exeter Lang. 12: Boy, did I cream that exam! [W&F].
[US]New Yorker 19 Jan. 27: Now you guys [gangsters] all know what you’re supposed to do and when, so let’s cream this up. This is one caper I don’t want any slipup on [W&F].
[US]Baker et al. CUSS 101: Cream Do well on an exam.
[NZ] McGill Reed Dict. of N.Z. Sl.

(c) of a driver, to go fast.

[US]E. De Roo Go, Man, Go! 84: You go for thrills. Cream and scream.
[UK]I. Hebditch ‘Weekend’ unpub. thesis in Hewitt (2000) 135: I’m almost doing seventy [...] Then Jim Lush creams past me on big new lilac Vespa S.S., he must be touching eighty.

(d) in fig. use, to do something to excess, e.g. drinking.

[Scot]I. Welsh Trainspotting 199: Ah wis creamin a boatil ay tequila a day at one stage.

3. to skim money from a business’s turnover [play on SE skim].

[UK]T. Lewis GBH 45: ‘Whoever’s creaming it, they’re being very clever [...] I’m buggered if I can see where.

In phrases

cream it (v.)

(N.Z. prison) to be a sycophant, to curry favour.

[NZ]D. Looser Boobslang [U. Canterbury D.Phil. thesis] 48/1: cream it v. to ingratiate by calculated subservience, to curry favour from prison authorities in an attempt to get through one’s sentence easily.
cream (in) one’s jeans (v.) (also cream (in) one’s pants)

1. to ejaculate or become vaginally wet while still fully dressed.

[Aus]B. Humphries Barry McKenzie [comic strip] in Complete Barry McKenzie (1988) 72: The first bastards who cop an eyeful of this lot will either cream their jeans or come across swiftly with the folding stuff.
[UK]S. Berkoff East in Decadence and Other Plays (1985) 71: She sees what grows between my knees and creams her jeans.
[US]S. King It (1987) 372: ‘Ride it, Big Bill!’ Richie screamed, so scared he was nearly creaming his jeans but laughing wildly all the same.
[US]Alt. Eng. Dict. 🌐 cream one’s jeans (verb phrase, idiom) to ejaculate in one’s underwear (or pants).
[NZ]McGill Reed Dict. of N.Z. Sl. 55: cream your jeans To ejaculate sperm, or to become excessively excited. ANZ.
[US]T. Pluck ‘Hot Rod Heart’ in Life During Wartime 126: ‘Only thing that boy’s gonna cream is his jeans’.

2. in fig. use, to become very excited; note one-off extrapolation in cit. 1985.

[US] (ref. to late 1950s) B. Rodgers Queens’ Vernacular 56: cream one’s jeans (late ’50s) to become climactically excited.
[US]M. Casey ‘National Guardsman’ in Obscenities 7: The interviewers will cream in their pants.
[US]L. Heinemann Close Quarters (1987) 22: The Colonel came down and jus’ about creamed his fucken jeans, said there was something like six hundred fuckin’ body count.
[US](con. 1968) D.A. Dye Citadel (1989) 206: Christ. Don’t cream your jeans, Captain. This won’t last long.
[Aus]B. Humphries Traveller’s Tool 14: Bone structure which had some of Australia’s top fashion photographers creaming their Kodaks.
[UK]J. Mowry Way Past Cool 78: Some gonna start creamin their jeans over that goddam car.
[Aus]P. Temple Black Tide (2012) [ebook] Wait till you see this, you’ll cream your jeans.
see sense 1.
[UK]N. ‘Razor’ Smith Raiders 23: When the police received Bob’s picture [...] they almost creamed their blue-serge pants.
[Aus]L. Redhead Thrill City [ebook] That accent makes me cream my jeans every time I hear it.
cream the cheese (v.)

to masturbate; to bring to orgasm.

[NZ]Number One Adult Sexual Health Terms Advisor 🌐 Masturbation Slang Male Terms: [...] cream the cheese.
Las Vegas for Visitors at govegas.about.com 🌐 A $20 lap dance was enough to cream the cheese as an excellent dancer treated the purple headed avenger to an exercise in grinding one’s coffee.
cream up (v.)

see sense 2b above.

get creamed (v.)

to be wholly defeated, lit. and fig.

[US]J.H. O’Hara Pal Joey 42: I got creamed out of the hotel spot in Ohio.
[US]H. Ellison ‘Have Coolth’ in Gentleman Junkie (1961) 128: Get creamed once by a down chick and you’ve had it.
[US](con. WWII) R. Leckie Marines! 66: Stop, Sarge! Don’t go in there or you’ll get creamed.
[US]T. Thackrey Thief 228: Well if you ain’t topped – who the hell was it got creamed in that Caddy?
[US]T. O’Brien If I Die in a Combat Zone (1980) 62: Christ, all us officers would sit around and [...] joke about getting our asses creamed.
[US]R. Price Blood Brothers 29: Three guys are after my ass wit’ bats. I’m gonna get creamed. Hurry!
[US]C. Hiaasen Strip Tease 65: Rojo was getting creamed, and Crandall wasn’t surprised.
[UK]Camden New Journal 3: The cats are getting creamed!