![[Aus]](/static/img/flags/aus.png "Australia")
Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 125: [They] were wondering what horse to back. Overhearing their conversation, a grizzled old cocky said: ‘I’d back mine.’ ‘What’s its name?’ asked Dave. ‘Humdinger,’ said the old cocky. ‘And is it?’ ‘Abso-bloody-lutely.’. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 137: You made a complete arse of yourself. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 50: Why don’t you kiss my arse! Penguin Book of All-New Aus. Jokes 33: A young boy is in his room playing with himself when his mother comes in and catches him. ‘If you keep doing that you’ll go blind!’ she yells. The boy replies: ‘Well, can I keep doing it until I need glasses?’. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 167: You can bet your arse I didn’t get a triple bogey! Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 195: My thumb still hurts like buggery. Penguin Book of All-New Aus. Jokes 208: [She] has been hit by a ball and is out cold on the fairway. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 186: After she repeated duffed shots, the pro said: ‘You have a death-grip on the club and it’s killing your power.’. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 147: Why are men like toilets? They’re either vacant, engaged or full of crap. Penguin Book of All-New Aus. Jokes 166: Pick it up! It’s a gimme [of a shot in golf]. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 142: ‘You say here that your wife is crazy.’ Mickey replied: ‘No I didn’t. I said she’s fucking Goofy.’. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 50: I’ll have a glass of beer. But not too hot. And not too cold. But right in the groove. Penguin Book of All-New Aus. Jokes 39: A bloke sat in a pub, just drinking a beer and minding his own business, when all of a sudden, a big hoon came in, knocked him off his stool. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 130: ‘I’ve got bad news. I have to lay you or Jack off.’ And Debra replied: ‘Would you mind jacking off? I’ve got a terrible headache.’. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 175: ‘We saw some frogs [...] and then we put firecrackers up their arse.’ ‘Rectum, Tommy,’ Mum said reprovingly, ‘rectum!’ And Tommy said, ‘Blood oath we did!’. Penguin Book of All-New Aus. Jokes 208: Man playing by himself on a gorgeous clear morning, thinking he wouldn’t be dead for quids. Penguin Bk of All-New Aus. Jokes 204: ‘Jack Nicklaus would never leave a girl after he’s made love to her twice – back into bed!’ So they saddle up for the third time. Penguin Book of All-New Aus. Jokes 159: Commitment Schmittment (formerly Wedlock Schmedlock). Penguin Book of All-New Aus. Jokes 12: ‘I think I’ll get a Coke.’ ‘No trubs,’ says the Aussie, ‘I’ll get it for you.’.